Over the past few years I have met countless people who have escaped authoritarian religions like the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) church movement or your every day garden variety Evangelical church. Authoritarian ecclesiastical structures and authoritarian pastors dominate the lives of those who come under their spell.
Most authoritarian churches believe God ordained a chain of command, not only in the church but in the home. These churches almost always practice complementarianism.
Wikipedia defines complementarianism as:
A theological view held by some in Christianity and other world religions, such as Islam, that men and women have different but complementary roles and responsibilities in marriage, family life, religious leadership, and elsewhere.
Some authoritarian churches are more complementarian than others, but all of them believe God ordained a strict order in the church and home. An extreme form of complementarianism is Biblical Patriarchy.
The central tenets of Biblical Patriarchy are:
God reveals Himself as masculine, not feminine.
God ordained distinct gender roles for man and woman as part of the created order.
A husband and father is the head of his household, a family leader, provider, and protector.
Male leadership in the home carries over into the church: only men are permitted to hold the ruling office in the church. A God-honoring society will likewise prefer male leadership in civil and other spheres.
Since the woman was created as a helper to her husband, as the bearer of children, and as a “keeper at home,” the God-ordained and proper sphere of dominion for a wife is the household and that which is connected with the home.
God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply” still applies to married couples.
Christian parents must provide their children with a thoroughly Christian education, one that teaches the Bible and a biblical view of God and the world.
Both sons and daughters are under the command of their fathers as long as they are under his roof or otherwise the recipients of his provision and protection.
Some advocates of Biblical Patriarchy teach that women are “part of a chain of command. God is at the top, then Jesus, after that the husband, then the wife, and finally the children.” (above is taken from Vision Forum , The Tenets of Biblical Patriarchy)
Authoritarian churches spend significant time reminding church members that they are to submit to those God has placed in authority. Those who refuse or are unable to obey are often publicly exposed as being worldly, disobedient, carnal, or backslidden. Often pastors preach sermons about these people, not naming names, but leaving no doubt who the pastor is talking about.
If the disobedient church members doesn’t repent, they are likely to find themselves ostracized, under church discipline, or asked to leave the church. Authoritarian churches demand conformity to the church’s teachings. Free spirits with a difference of opinion rarely last long in an authoritarian church. They are viewed as a challenge to God ordained authority and such challenges are never allowed lest church members begin to think they are free to believe whatever they want to believe.
Authoritarian pastors often preach sermons on pastoral authority (obey me, I am God’s chosen man), male authority in the home (obey me, I am God’s chosen man), obedience to the Word of God (obey what God’s chosen man says God says in the Bible), and self-denial (self, who you really are is sinful and wicked and must be put to death).
Authoritarian pastors preach a demanding God who demands continual spiritual improvement, and in some cases, perfection. Church members regularly hear sermons on the importance of spiritual disciplines like studying the Bible, praying, and family devotions, and are regularly reminded that God expect them to be in church every time the church doors are open. They are also reminded that God owns them, they are his slave. God owns their life, including their money. Church members are expected to tithe, give offerings, and participate in any special offerings the church decides to collect.
Authoritarian churches control almost every aspect of the church member’s life. They are told what they must believe and how their homes should be structured. They are told what they should do with their money and how they are to dress. They are told who to vote for, what to read, what to watch on TV, and what kind of music to listen to. Even in sexual matters, the church prescribes what is proper, God honoring sex.
I am sure what I written above sounds surreal to some of you. Who, in their right mind, would ever submit to such a demanding, controlling, and demeaning religion? Surely, few people attend such churches? Sadly, tens of millions of Americans attend authoritarian churches. Surely, these people are poor, ignorant, uneducated people; no educated person would ever submit themselves to such things?
The next time you watch one of the many Christian TV stations, pay attention to the congregation. What do you see? Well dressed, prosperous people can be seen everywhere. Doctors, lawyers, teachers, and college professors. People with degrees from public universities. Yes, many of the people are poor or middle class working people, but most every authoritarian church has upper class, educated members.
Secularists believe that education is the anecdote for religious superstition, yet authoritarian churches have numerous educated members. (and countless educated people who believe the earth is 6,000 years old) How do we explain this?
Authoritarian churches know what they believe and they staunchly hold on to and defend those beliefs. They are certain that their beliefs line up exactly with what God wrote in the Bible. It is this certainty that attracts people to authoritarian churches. People want answers for the big questions of life. They want to know that their life has meaning and purpose and that there is life beyond the grave. In an uncertain world that seems to be changing every day, they want stability and permanence.
Several years ago, I corresponded with a young man who was a member of a church I pastored. He was also a student in our Christian School. I told him I had a lot of guilt over what I preached and how controlling I was. (guilt I still struggle with to this day) He told me it wasn’t all my fault and that many of the people who came to the church wanted someone to tell them what to believe and how to live.
People are looking for answers, and authoritarian churches have lots of answers to give. Certainty, coupled with a close-knit, warm, and friendly church community, draws people in. They think they have f-i-n-a-l-l-y found the answer to their heart’s longing. Little do they know the heavy price that will be extracted from them for the privilege of being a member of The Only True Church in Town Baptist Church.
Authoritarian churches rob people of their identity. God, Jesus, and the church are the only things that matter, Church members are expected to crucify the flesh, to die to self. Normal human urges and expressions are deemed sin. God’s demands are constantly preached from the pulpit. Be ye perfect, even as your father in heaven is perfect. While no member is perfect, they are expected to strive for perfection. Since Jesus gave his all for them, surely they should want to give their all for Jesus the church.
While authoritarian churches preach up grace, they believe that “true” Christians believe and live according to teachings of the Bible. (actually they believe and live according to the Bible interpretations of the pastor) Most authoritarian churches teach the security of the believer (once saved, always saved, perseverance of the saints). However, if you listen closely to what they teach, you will find they believe “true” Christians believe the right doctrines and live a certain way. While they preach salvation by grace, they are actually preaching a salvation that is a mixture of grace, right beliefs, and right living. (even though they vehemently deny this)
I need to make one thing clear, Authoritarian churches base their beliefs and practices on the Bible. Every belief and practice has a proof-text to prove that a particular belief or practice is ordained by God. Authoritarian churches are Bible literalists and pride themselves in being people of the book. They are God said and I believe it, kind of people.
It should come as no surprise that this kind of religion messes people up emotionally and psychologically. Many people who leave authoritarian religions require years of psychotherapy to gain back what was taken from them. Sadly, in many cases, the damage is so severe that the person remains an emotional and psychological cripple the rest of their lives.
Authoritarian religion robs people of their identity. They gave up self to gain Jesus. People who leave authoritarian churches are often lost, in the sense that they have no idea who they are. They have spent decades living for Jesus and have no idea who they are and what it means to be human.
Often, people who leave authoritarian churches bring a lot of baggage with them. They battle with perfectionist tendencies and black and white thinking. Immersion in authoritarian religion robs a person of the ability to see nuance. They are taught that every question has an answer and that doubt and ambiguity are the tools of Satan.
In their post-authoritarian religion life they see a world filled with nuance and ambiguity. They have lots of questions that seem to have no answers. This is quite unsettling for many people. Their former world was controlled and safe. Their present world is wild and dangerous.
People who leave authoritarian churches often have trouble integrating back into society. They have left the bondage of authoritarianism but authoritarian beliefs and philosophies still live on deep in their psyche. It might take years for them to truly be free from it.
In many cases, the person may never be completely free from their past. The scars are deep and sometimes the damage done is permanently crippling. People who leave authoritarian churches want to get their life back but, in many cases, this is impossible. For many, the best they can hope for is an uneasy peace with their past. I know people want to be FREE, FREE AT LAST but sometimes true, complete freedom is difficult to obtain.
In my own life, I have to live with with the fact that I am both an abuser and a victim. I grew up and was trained in authoritarian churches. I attended an authoritarian college. As I entered the ministry and began pastoring churches, I promoted and practiced authoritarianism. How could I do anything else? It was all that I knew. It was all that was ever modeled to me. When you are in the Evangelical bubble it all makes sense. Only when you are out of the bubble do you look back and say, Wow! I believed and practiced some bat-shit crazy stuff.
Every day, I live with guilt over the harm I did to other people. Yes, they attended the churches I pastored on their own accord. No one forced them to be a church member but I still must own what I taught and the how those teachings played out in the lives of the people who called me preacher or pastor.
In some ways, this blog is an act of penance. I can’t go back and undo the damage done to other people. All I can do is be honest about the past and try to bring to light the pernicious things that go on in Evangelical churches.
I am of the opinion that much of Evangelicalism and movements like the IFB have beliefs and practices that emotionally and psychologically harm people. I know many Evangelical will object to being painted with such a broad brush, but authoritarianism is so widespread within Evangelicalism, that I see “good” Evangelicals as an apple in the midst of a trash can full of garbage. Instead of defending Evangelicalism, they need to wash the rotten filth off and leave. (as those in the emerging, emergent church have done)
When I write posts like this, there is sure to be someone who suggests their church is NOT like this. They are certain that their Evangelical church is different. Perhaps, but not likely.
Recently, one commenter was appalled by what I had written about the the IFB church movement. She pointed me to a website that she thought promoted a kinder, gentler version of Christianity. A Christianity of love and acceptance. A Christianity without “man’s” rules. In her opinion, this was the answer for those caught up in authoritarian fundamentalism.
I checked out the website and I took a look at their doctrinal statement. The Bible is the inerrant, inspired Word of God. Hell awaits those who reject Jesus as the Lord and Savior. Standard Evangelical beliefs. So, they may be kinder and gentler, but the authority of the Word of God still looms large and people who refuse to repent and believe the gospel go to hell.
As much as Evangelicals might scream and deny it, Evangelicalism is a fundamentalist religion. Some Evangelicals eschew social fundamentalism but ALL Evangelicals embrace theological fundamentalism. IFB churches are social and theological fundamentalists. Evangelicals are Bible literalists, so it should come as no surprise that authoritarianism is so widespread. It is,after all, in the B-i-b-l-e.
People who want to leave authoritarian religions have one of three options:
- They can try to find a liberal Christian church that allows them to be who they are and makes no demands of them.
- They can investigate non-Christian religions that allow freedom and self-awareness. (eastern religions, earth religions,spirituality)
- They can reject religion altogether and embrace a non-theistic, humanist way of life.
For me personally, I had to leave it all to find true deliverance and freedom. In order for me to find out who I really was, I had to disavow and abandon my past. In atheism and humanism, I have found myself and I have found a way of life that best reflects the world I live in. I also found out that my beliefs about God, Jesus, and the Bible are built upon a foundation of contradictions, lies, and distortions. Once I found out the Bible was not an inspired, inerrant text, my Evangelical house of cards came tumbling to the ground.
This is my Promised Land. Like the Israelites of the Bible, there is no turning back. Yes, I still feel the past beckoning to me but, day by day, its pull becomes less and less and I hope, in time, my authoritarian past will no longer be in rearview mirror as I pass over the next mountain. I am not there yet but I am getting closer.
My daughter-in-law grew up in an IFB with a pastor like you describe. There was another aspect to it. The pastor believed that he was responsible to God for the behavior of the church members. Thought he would be judged for the their sins, so he worked hard to make sure they didn’t sin. And he made himself physically ill from the stress. Like you say, a victim and an abuser. It’s a vicious cycle of having to make sure you’re good enough.
You bring up a good point I should have addressed. As a pastor I was motivated not only by my devotion to God and the Bible but the belief that I was the under shepherd of the church, given the responsibility to watch over the souls of the people. (teachings found in the Bible) I took seriously the sinful failures of the people I pastored and I did all I could through preaching, counseling, and rebuke to get them back on the straight and narrow path. Sadly,many of their “sins” were just people being people. (as were my own “sins”.)
Wow, does that church sign ever conjur up un-church-like images! In two of my fictional books, “The Balaam Surrogate” and “A Coveted Servitude,” I have characters who propose ministries of healing to those who have been wounded, injured, battered, vicitmized, vilified, slandered, and victims of character assassinations. Little did I know that such a ministry (or clinic) might really be indicated in some cases. Bruce, I am a former IFB pastor, and like you, I regret some of the bovine scat I dispensed from the pulpit. I’m still a believer, and I still attend (with much difficulty), but it’s astonishing to me how much our experiences actually intersect. Someday, as job and life’s duties allow, I might just start up a clinic/practice/Bible study or some such vehicle expressly for the purpose of helping people to heal from church-caused trauma. I’m glad I found your blog and I’ve enjoyed your essays and the freedom to post. Thanks!!!
Thank you, Bruce, for the public acknowledgement of the harm caused by IFB. I sometimes wonder what my best friend in childhood would think to read something like this. She’s stayed in IFB all these years and she and her pastor husband are planting a church now. Sadly, I don’t think she would “get it.” Just as I don’t get how she could possibly still be in it and believe just as we did as children.
Fundamentalism DOES ingrain perfectionism and black-and-white thinking. You are taught that the Bible contains the answer to any problem. Everything you encounter in life is looked at through those Bible glasses.
Going to different denominations and more liberal churches hasn’t been the answer for me. Well, it depends on my mood. I don’t fit into UU. United Methodist is somewhat uncomfortable, and Presbyterian was more uncomfortable than Methodist. Although I can enjoy parts, I feel like “if people knew that I don’t believe most of this in the traditional way, they would reject me.” I think churches, period, frustrate me, because there’s no real discussion. If there is discussion, it’s only safe, approved-type discussion.
So leaving Christianity and fundamentalism does leave you with a “Who the heck am I?” problem, for sure. You’re kind of a man without a country. Because as you said, IFB-type churches take over your whole identity, and they don’t encourage self-esteem, self-reliance, trusting your own judgment and all that.
I agree with the comparison of the IFB churches with evangelicalism. Being raised evangelical I find little to no difference in the way the evangelical church was in the 80′s and early 90′s and the IFB church today. The evangelicals relaxed their social standards to allow drinking and watching mainstream movies and listening to secular music. I think they realized they are losing control and now are resorting to the “New Calvinist” schitck to bring the sheeple back in line. There are enough books and yes men for the Calvinist point of view to make you think you are smart and confirm your position for an infinite amount of time.
I guess the key is to be well rounded in your inquiry and not be a one trick pony. I took option one on your list and am trying liberal Christianity out. Geography, family and my recent research into church history makes this a viable option for me. In leaving performance based Christianity I think taking on the Athiest position cleanses the intellectual pallet so to speak.
When I read your post, I started having brain aches. You made me think in areas I normally don’t. I wanted to run here and dump out what was in my head, but I didn’t want to write a book. So more thinking and more brain exercise that causes fuzzy fog in the head.
I have four comments, and I will try to keep them from running away with themselves.
ONE – IFB is quite authoritative, in a way that is never mentioned in the Bible and never intended by Jesus. You are spot on there. I wonder about my attraction to that structure.
TWO – People stay because they *want* to be there. Some people want to have rules, be told they are different in a good way, and not have to think and decide things. Others leave.
THREE – In my experience, the Evangelical churches are not as authoritative as the IFB. Their power seems to be based on the deacons, not the pastor. They still have a lot of politics, but the power is spread out slightly. This may be partly culture; being from the South, our churches are often different.
FOUR – Yes the Bible is an authoritative book. But that authority applies to the leaders as much as anybody. What they say is to be weighed against what it teaches. If it strays too far, what are you doing there? Of course, you should recognize that sometimes it is a matter of opinion that makes us disagree, and the Bible does not make it clear. Well, that is our call. But acknowledge you might be wrong.
Hope you are doing well Bruce. I will keep looking for new posts.
Thank you for writing this Bruce. It’s a masterpiece.
Bruce, i resonate with this. your so my kind of style. So many of us have experienced this – many are still in hostage. Nice to come to your page every now and then.
This is why I like your blog! Thank you for writing these piercing posts.
A few days ago, I was writing a blog post on the Jack Schaap scandal and listened to an excerpt of a particularly misogynist sermon he gave years ago. The rigid, ruthless authoritarianism you describe completely saturated his talk. To live in such congregations must be soul-crushing for anyone trying to cultivate a shred of self-esteem.
“Who, in their right mind, would ever submit to such a demanding, controlling, and demeaning religion?”
I’m wondering if upbringing has something to do with it. If many of these people were raised in authoritarian families and churches, they may have “imprinted: on authoritarianism and see it as normal.
I feel you are right in part. Others just want to be right so much, that they close their eyes to what they are really doing. You can find the same “belief” in those who believe in psychics.
Going to church was a nightmare for my self esteem as a woman and a person. I tried other churches after the IFB but they all start with you are born as garbage and need a bloody sacrifice of god, for god and by god to save you. When I finally figured it out, that Christianity is based on the fact that we are all sinners and need god’s help, I thought who needs this?
Being just plain human is amazing and I like it a lot better
God, Jesus, man, woman, children chain of command is so bogus.
I commented on this article over at Patheos. I didn’t realize that this one is the original post. So I’m copying my comment here:
Having spent three decades in authoritarian evangelical churches, up until a year ago, I would say that your assessment is very accurate, Bruce. I do want to suggest, however, that you seem to have omitted another option for those who want to leave authoritarian churches. That is to leave the institution without leaving the faith. You can still be a Christian without being a member of an organization. There are many people, like my husband and me, who embrace the essentials of faith in Christ but reject what we would consider false or misguided teachings about the church put forth by most evangelicals. We believe that the church is simply all those who follow Christ. We are committed to following Him, not so-called church “leaders.” Our lives are very different now. We are free, and we are very happy!
I love this comment. Me and my hubby feel the exact same way!
I can’t thank you enough for writing this wonderful blog which has played a major role for my happiness when I decided to leave Christianity. as much as I love reading about these things, it also makes me sad when I think of friends, wonderful people I love very much, who live like this. I wish for the freedom that you, I and so many of your readers have gained by “seeing the light” when it comes to Jesus, Christianity and the bible.
On a different note, I can finally publish my own comments!:) Don’t know how that suddenly started working for me, but I’m happy.
My husband and I belonged to a church, not IFB, but believing in the Bible being God’s truth etc. The church focused so much on unimportant stuff, how a person (really, women) dressed, what we ate, etc etc. Similar emphasis on sinfulness of church member. We left the church and I am happy to say, I have a belief in God who is there for me. My husband is happier as an agnostic/atheist (he’s not quite sure which yet) and that is fine with me. I appreciate all the things you say, Bruce, because it applies to so many churches that have strict, “you must do this to be a Christian” rules. The denomination we were in didn’t baptize people who smoked, they had to stop before they were baptized. Talk about works instead of grace!
Hi Bruce,
This is a great post. So much of it reminds me of my time in Fundamentalism. My brother’s recent sudden death led me back to trying to recover my Fundamentalism. I guess it was fear of hell which I thought I had long overcome. Strange how Fundamentalism, which I thought I had long left, can bring back such irrational fears.
I decided that I would blog on a compassionate Calvinism but a bruising encounter over at the Defcon blog showed me that it is highltyunlikely that a compassionate version of Calvinism can ever be developed.
Fundamentalism has an inbuilt authoritarian streak which you rightly point to. I must have been crazy to want to go back to Fundamentalism out of irrational fear.
If God is love (assuming he exists) why would he burn and torture people in hell forever? What kind of person would want to see people suffer forever? Would he not do everything possible to rescue them and if he is almighty does he not have the power to rescue them/ If he fails to recue them, then why would we think that he is love?
I am moving towards nontheistic Quaker humanism.
Thanks for your thoughtful comments, Bruce!
Shalom,
John Arthur
I wanted to thank you for such an insightful look into the mindset of these authoritarian religions. Too many mistake certainty for truth. I applaud your courage in confronting the reality of our relationship with the Divine. It is a daunting struggle, but very worth it, because in the end we reclaim our own souls.
This is a great piece Bruce. Your observations completely validate my experience in this type of a church. Having escaped over 5 years ago..to this day the leader’s preaching still focuses on “OBEY”..his latest sermons are called “Obeying the gospel”.
He’s a staunch calvinist (though he’d probably deny this) & in the past taught all of the other churches, (except his of course) teach works salvation..yet he puts so many burdens on people that other churches would never dare to. I thought of the verse how the leaders “lay heavy burdens on others, grievous to be borne & don’t lift a finger to help..”
Over time I could not deny the hypocrisies, cruelty & contradiction of it all. It’s one prison that is hard as hell to escape. But it can be done. It’s been hard to escape but it is worth it!
Me too! I just had two horrible experiences with authoritarian churches. Would love to find a good one (we have been to some) but am gun shy and just content to stay away for now but totally christian – and even a better christian!
Thank you for this post… I am not an American -My church is Anglican with strong Charismatic leanings. For me personally, my church got more and more authoritarian and I started to doubt. Now I am an atheist and am immensely touched by the words you have written in your blog posts. Thank you so much.
You are quite welcome.
I was raised in a church that grew more authoritarian. The church eventually became IFB. Like you, I became more socially liberal, first. Then gradually, I began to move away from the church. But even when I left church, I still identified as Christian.
A lot of what you wrote here rang true to me. Like how I believed that my church was “the one true church”.
It was a cult. And I hope I will never be involved in another one for the rest of my life, even though our minds are so easily swayed.