This is the latest installment in the Songs of Sacrilege series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. If you know of a song that is irreverent towards religion, makes fun of religion, pokes fun at sincerely held religious beliefs, or challenges the firmly held religious beliefs of others, please send me an email.
Today’s Song of Sacrilege is Atheists Don’t Have No Songs by Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Rangers.
Lyrics
You know, religious people have such beautiful music and art
And atheists really have nothing…
Until now!
A little tune called “Atheists Don’t Have No Songs”
Christians have their hymns and pages.
(Hymns and pages)
Hava Nagila’s for the Jews.
(For the Jews)
Baptists have the rock of ages.
(Rock of ages)
Atheists just sing the blues.
Romantics play Claire de Lune.
(Claire de Lune)
Born agains sing He is risen.
But no one ever wrote a tune.
(Wrote a tune)
For godless existentialism.
(For godless existentialism)
For Atheists,
There’s no good news.
They’ll never sing,
A song of faith.
In their songs,
They have a rule.
The “he” is always lowercase.
The “he” is always lowercase.
Some folks sing a Bach cantata.
(Bach cantata)
Lutherans get Christmas trees.
Atheist songs add up to nada.
(Up to nada)
But they do have Sundays free.
(Have Sundays free)
Pentecostals sing, sing to heaven,
(Sing to heaven)
Gothics had the books of scrolls,
(Numerologists count)
Numerologists count, count to seven,
(Count to seven)
Atheists have rock and roll.
For atheists,
There’s no good news.
They’ll never sing,
A song of faith.
In their songs,
They have a rule.
The “he” is always lowercase.
The “he” is always lowercase.
Atheists
Atheists
Atheists
Don’t have no songs!
Christians have their hymns and pages.
(Hymns and pages)
Hava Nagila’s for the Jews.
(For the Jews)
Baptists have the rock of ages.
(Rock of ages)
Atheists just sing the blues.
Catholics,
Dress up for mass.
And listen to,
Gregorian chants.
Atheists,
Just take a pass.
Watch football in their underpants.
Watch football in their underpants.
Atheists
Atheists
Atheists
Don’t have no songs!
(Don’t have no songs)
Bruce Gerencser, 67, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 46 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
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I love this song. 🙂
I loved that! How fun! Now we atheists have a song! Thanks, Steve Martin!
This is amazing. Who else but Steve Martin could be behind it?