This is the latest installment in the Songs of Sacrilege series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. If you know of a song that is irreverent towards religion, makes fun of religion, pokes fun at sincerely held religious beliefs, or challenges the firmly held religious beliefs of others, please send me an email.
Today’s Song of Sacrilege is Gimme A Ride To Heaven, Boy by Terry Allen.
Lyrics
Well I was caught up with myself
On the highway at night
Drivin like a bat outta hell
When I beheld an amazing sight
It was a lonely apparition
By the roadside standing there
With his thumb out in the wilderness
And a halo in his hair
He said “Gimme a ride to heaven boy
I’ll Show you paradise
Yeah gimme a ride to heaven boy
My name is Jesus Christ”
So I come screeching to a halt
I said “Hop on in”
He said “thanks a lot for the lift
I forgive you of your sins
Yeah I just come from Jerusalem
Where things are going bad
Ahhh gimme a ride to heaven boy
I need to talk to my dad”
Well I didn’t know what to do
So I jammed her down in gear
Kind a kicked my feet beneath the seat
I was trying to hide the beer
Ahhh but he just grinned and said “My friend,
I know you must think it’s odd
But you got nothin to fear about drinkin a beer
If you share it with the son of God”
He said “Gimme a ride to heaven boy
I’ll Show you paradise
Yeah gimme a ride to heaven boy
My name is Jesus Christ”
Well I saw good news in his baby blues
So I stomped it on the floor
I said you have to show me how to get there
I ain’t been before
“Well it’s a hard place to find” he said
“But I’ll give you a little clue
It ain’t somewhere up in the air
Its sittin right here inside with you”
Then right in the middle of that perfect smile
From his robes he pulled a gun
An stuck it up beside my head and said
“How’s this for Kingdom Come?”
Well I pulled off scared but I heard him say
As he left me beneath the stars
“The Lord moves in mysterious ways
and tonight, my son … He’s gonna use your car”
Bruce Gerencser, 66, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 45 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
Connect with me on social media:
Your comments are welcome and appreciated. All first-time comments are moderated. Please read the commenting rules before commenting.
You can email Bruce via the Contact Form.
I don’t know if it’s blasphemous but it’s corny, it’s fun, it’s about Jesus, and it played at Austin City Limits so it must be country. I’m learning to play it. We’ll see what my Bible toter friends say about it. Here it is at ACL. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=puoD11r9_58
Interesting. No surprise either, the point that is made. Jesus must be terrifying to many given the history of Christianity, Christendom. No different today.
Fascinating lyrics,Bruce ! Where on Earth did you find this one ? Usually when I listen to music, it’s KROQ FM while doing housework. ( Alt rock station). Or when feeling moved to hear deep stuff, it’s Mongolian and movie soundtracks,like Terry Blanchard and his ” Black Klansman” instrumentals.
Deleted for violating comment rules.