The Life and Times of Bruce Gerencser

Thirty Years of Chronic Pain Relief Treatments and I’m Still Hurting

Written by

Bruce Gerencser

in

,
cures for pain

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 1997. Since then, I have added osteoarthritis, degenerative spine disease, gastroparesis, exocrine pancreatic insufficiency, and severe axonal neuropathy to my health resume, along with a plethora of debilitating symptoms that afflict me day and night.

Over the past thirty years, countless people have suggested I do this or that for pain; that they are sure if I will do ___________ that all or most of my pain will magically disappear. Anecdotes abound. I know a person who did __________ and their fibromyalgia went completely away! I know another person who took this or that supplement/magic food, and all their pain disappeared! And so the emails, texts, and social media messages say, day after day, month after month, year after year. Never mind what I want. They just KNOW that if I will follow their anecdotal proclamations, I will be healed.

What follows is a list of things I have tried for pain since 1997:

Prayer

Pleading with God

Asking others to pray for my healing

Pretending I am not in pain

Magnets

Genie massager

Chiropractor

Darvocet (removed from market due to causing heart problems)

Tramadol

Flexeril

Restoril

Amitriptyline

Lyrica

Guaifenesin (off label use)

TENS unit

Diet change

Exercise

Supplements

Hydrocodone

Gabapentin

Steaming hot baths (with magnesium epsom salts)

Distraction

Moved to Yuma, Arizona, hoping the weather would be good for me

Electric heating pads for legs, neck, and spine

Gel boiled water heating pads

Padded bed covering

Weighted blanket

Aspirin and Tylenol

Massage by Miss Polly, the sexy masseuse

Surgery

Therapy

Steroid and lidocaine injections

Physical therapy (a waste of time)

NSAID creams and patches (worthless)

Ambien

Gabapentin again

Flexeril again

Pain medications cut or removed per medical practice policy

Hit other body part to take away pain in extremity

Cannabis

Cymbalta (for neuropathy in legs)

Crying

During this time I read books about Fibromyalgia and chronic pain. I also saw more doctors than I can count: primary care doctor, rheumatologist, neurologist, multiple pain management doctors, and neurosurgeon. I’ve been seen by teams of doctors at the University of Michigan and Toledo Hospital. In 2007, I had a complete day-long work-up for multiple sclerosis (MS).

Here’s what has worked — so far:

  • Hydrocodone
  • Aspirin and Tylenol
  • Massage by Miss Polly, the sexy masseuse
  • Genie massager (a professional electric massager used in therapy/chiropractor offices)
  • Hot baths
  • Electric heating pads
  • Cymbalta (for neuropathy)
  • Cannabis (for sleep and nausea, doesn’t do much for pain, outside of helping me sleep)
  • Distraction (particularly cats, grandchildren, and writing)

As you can see, I have done what I can to alleviate my pain. The “miracle” jar is empty, and no cure is on the horizon. I fully expect to live the remaining days of my life in pain. It is what it is. I can accept that, though it seems other well-meaning people can’t. They are certain that if I will just listen to them and do ___________, my pain will markedly decrease or go away. Their “certainty” turns them into prophets of woo — a term used to describe beliefs involving pseudoscience, superstition, or magical thinking.

Want to help me? Continue to read my writing. Send me an encouraging email or message now and again. Comment on this blog. Donate (see, Bruce is in it for the money). Write a guest post. Promote my blog far and wide. Suggest to me subjects to cover with a blog post. Send Polly a note, thanking her for putting up with my shit. Bethany too. Both of them deserve better.

Thank you for your continued love and support.

signature

Bruce Gerencser, 69, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 48 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.

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Comments

8 responses to “Thirty Years of Chronic Pain Relief Treatments and I’m Still Hurting”

  1. Merle

    We live in a world that just happened. Causes we do not understand caused events that we do not understand that created a universe in ways we do not fully understand that worked in a way that inevitably created us.

    Everything you wrote here makes sense in light of this. Random events have caused humans with all their amazing wonder, and have also caused unimaginable pain. All of this is consistent with such a world.

    But if a loving, all-powerful God was the source, nothing you write here makes sense. How could a God possibly want this?

    I admire your persistence and courage through all of this. You have done, and continue to do a great service to the rest of us. And there are many of us who read what you write, and love the person you have become. There is a fire of goodness that radiates from you and is an encouragement to all of us.

    I know this cannot possibly end the pain, but if this is any help, there are many of us who see your pain, who are so sorry this is happening to you, and who truly care about you. We care about you.

    When you go to bed at night, you can surely feel good about the person that you are, and know that many other people see that goodness in you.

    Reply
  2. Mj Lisbeth

    I can only second what Merle has said,

    Reply
  3. Avatar
    … Zoe ~

    Personally, a book of ancient spells for ***holes who keep giving you advice might come in handy.

    Dear Polly. You rock! Bethany, I love your name. <3

    I don’t know how to say this but I found myself counting up the number of things on your list that I tried. :/

    Reply
  4. Avatar
    Becky Rogers Wiren

    Oh yeah. I, too, have a list of things to relieve pain. My husband went through naltrexone because a study showed in helped with pain. WELL, I checked and the study said he helped some random, really low percentage. WTF?? That really doesn’t do much when one is in moderate to severe pain, lol.

    Reply
  5. Avatar
    ObstacleChick

    I’m sorry you how through all that pain. I thoroughly enjoy your writing, and if I coukd magically make all your ailments go away, I certainly would. Every person in your family and friends circle would (and I include us readers in that circle though we’re not as important as your IRL folks). You’re a tough, no-nonsense cookie with a strongly compassionate and justice side.

    The appeal of the wellness (or MAHA) community is that they purport to offer possible solutions. People want to feel in control, and even though those of us who aren’t medical professionals aren’t trained in medicine, we still like to try to learn and find possible remedies. Maybe there are some things that can offer marginal relief, but efficacy probably differs person to person. Some of the wellness “cures” or remedies can be just downright painful (I find sauna and cold plunge to be painful – not a big fan). My stubbornness led me to try to white-knuckle my way through perimenopause, and finally I started using HRT. Damn, I wish I had started that sooner! I tried almost every non-hormonal remedy, and nothing really worked. Bam – science-backed therapy worked. Why did I have to be stubborn? 😁

    Reply
  6. Avatar
    Karen the rock whisperer

    Damn, Bruce, I’d whisk you off to a future time when all of what ails you is easily cured, except that my TARDIS never seems to get out of the shop. 🙂

    Seriously, my own health problems are less than a tenth of yours, and I am also periodically in a position of having to put off well-meaning people who push the magic cure of the month on me without me asking. I don’t understand how people feel obliged to comment on the health of any but those who are extremely close. Even then, “what did the doctor say?” shouldn’t immediately be followed by, “did you talk about XYZ (unproven) treatment?”

    Reply
    1. Avatar
      Bruce Gerencser

      Good to see your comment. ❤️❤️ As I was somewhere between sleep and screaming the other night, you came to my mind. I know, I know, weird thoughts sometimes, but the regular readers/commenters have become family for me, and even though we likely will never meet in the flesh, I do consider you a friend. So, I said to myself (and later to Polly) “I haven’t heard from Karen’s lately. I wonder if she’s okay?” Of course, I wondered —- since we are getting up there in age —- if you died. I’m glad you are still among the living. ❤️ Over the past decade, 5 readers have died. One man, Steve Gupton, had a massive heart attack and died. He was 51. https://www.jmwhitefuneralhome.com/obituaries/steven-gupton I had just been talking to him on the phone the night before. 😢

      As a largely homebound disabled man, this virtual community matters to me. For example, ObstacleChick hadn’t commented in a week or two —- unusual, to say the least. She typically comments when I post something, so it was odd that she hadn’t commented. She’s friends with Polly on Facebook.so I was able to figure out she was out of the country. I breathed a sigh of relief. Lots of people come and go, but the core community has continued to slowly grow. I call this cohort “I can piss them off, but not run them off” group.” Some of them have been reading my writing for 10-17 years. For other readers, there is always the potential that I’ll say something that pisses them off and they stop reading. Usually, it is my political views that upset people. That was certainly the case with COVID.

      All I intended to say is this: Good to see your comment, my friend. ❤️❤️ I took my nightly cannabis gummy an hour ago. I tend to get chatty, wordy, and hungry when under the influence. 😂😂❤️❤️

      Reply
  7. Avatar
    Levi

    Reading through that list, it’s hard not to feel the sheer weight of what you’ve been dealing with over the years. It also makes it very clear that you’re not someone who has avoided solutions or refused help. Quite the opposite.

    I can also understand the frustration with what you called the “prophets of woo.” Even when people mean well, there’s something exhausting about being handed confident answers that don’t actually account for your lived reality. At some point, it stops feeling like help and starts feeling like noise.

    I think what you said at the end is important. Sometimes the most helpful thing people can do is not try to fix the situation, but simply show up in ways that are actually wanted. Reading, engaging, encouraging, supporting. That’s a much different posture than prescribing.

    For what it’s worth, I respect the honesty in how you’ve written about this. It doesn’t come across as self-pitying, just… real.

    Wishing you steadiness in the middle of all of it.

    Reply

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