What is empathy? Psychology Today defines it like this:
Empathy is the ability to recognize, understand, and share the thoughts and feelings of another person, animal, or fictional character. Developing empathy is crucial for establishing relationships and behaving compassionately. It involves experiencing another person’s point of view, rather than just one’s own, and enables prosocial or helping behaviors that come from within, rather than being forced.
It seems to me, and I suspect to you that empathy is a good thing; that empathy is essential to the progress of the human race. The Bible itself says that empathy (loving your neighbor as yourself) is essential to Christian faith. Empathy leads to and promotes goodness, kindness, and common decency. What’s not to like, right?
I am a child of the Evangelical church, but more than that I grew up in poverty. I experienced firsthand doing without. My upbringing afforded me the opportunity to learn a lot things about life, particularly within the church. I quickly learned that the church cared for its own, but not so much for anyone else. And some churches didn’t even care for their own. What mattered was saving souls, not feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, caring for the sick, and meeting the needs of widows and orphans. What I saw was an incestuous church only concerned with its own wellbeing — increased attendance, increased souls saved, and increased income. Today, megachurches — shrines to Evangelical wealth and power — dot the American landscape, testimonies to a religion far removed from the teachings of Jesus. Empathy is no longer emphasized or encouraged. It should be no surprise, then, that some Evangelical preachers are now condemning empathy. Granted, they are a minority within Evangelicalism, but their influence over the sect is larger than life. And now that the MAGA movement and its prophet Donald Trump have co-opted Evangelicalism, rabid capitalism and right-wing extremism have infested the church, resulting in indifference (apathy, unconcern, hardheartedness) towards suffering and poverty.
Theologically, I was a card-carrying Evangelical, but socially I rejected the church’s indifference towards “the least of these.” My children will tell you that I stressed the importance of being empathic towards the needs of others. Church members will tell you the same. I believed that empathy, compassion, and kindness were central to being a follower a Jesus. Years ago, my mother-in-law, a devout Independent Fundamentalist Baptist, got upset at me over an act of charity I had done for someone else; one that cost me a good bit of money. Mom said to me, “You would give someone the shirt off your back,” as if that was an awful thing to do. (Mom was raised in a family where care and concern rarely, if ever, extended beyond family.) And then, understanding the awful import of her criticism, Mom said, “Well, not that that would be a bad thing to do.”
I am sure Polly and the kids could share stories about how empathy worked out in my day-to-day life. My mantra was simple, “If you see a need and can help, do.” No one is expected to help beyond their abilities. I encouraged people to have a watchful eye for opportunities to be blessings to others.
Did I ever get taken advantage of? Yep, but over time I develop skills that helped me sniff out con-artists. Take the preacher and his son who stopped by our church to get help to make it home from their travels. I quickly discerned this was a scam. How did I know? The old preacher was carrying a $4.99 Dollar General Bible. No preacher carries a cheap-ass Bible. Sorry, I’ve never seen it. The Bible is a tool of the trade for a preacher. No home builder uses a $3 hammer. Quality and durability matter, and so it is for preachers and their Bibles. For the record, my favorite Bible was the calf-skin Oxford KJV. I used to give homeless people money until I found out they were drinking it up at the bar. Going forward, I paid for meals and other needs instead of giving them money. But, even here empathy ruled. My obligation was to follow Jesus and the teachings of the Bible. What people did with the money I gave them was on them, not me. Wisdom is important, but far too often ‘wisdom” gets in the way of help others, and could be used a polite excuse for indifference and bigotry.
Think I am being too harsh on Evangelicals? Consider what is going on in Washington D.C. Evangelicals twice voted Donald Trump into office. Trump quickly rewarded them by appointing largely unqualified Evangelicals (and conservative Catholics and Mormons) to cabinet positions and administrative roles. The no-empathy crowd now dominates our government. Whatever compassion the Obama and Biden administrations may have had (and they were lacking too), it is now gone. Ruthlessness, violence, and indifference are now the norm. Empathy is for the weak, not for them. All that matters is advancing the Project 2025 blueprint. Well that and increasing the net worth of Trump, his family, and his lackeys.
Bruce Gerencser, 69, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 48 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
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