This is the sixty-ninth installment in The Sounds of Fundamentalism series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. If you know of a video clip that shows the crazy, cantankerous, or contradictory side of Evangelical Christianity, please send me an email with the name or link to the video. Please do not leave suggestions in the comment section. Let’s have some fun!
Today’s Sound of Fundamentalism is a clip of Becky Fischer teaching children how to raise people from the dead.
For a moment, I thought I stumbled onto the Onion by accident. This shit from her website:
The School of Supernatural Children’s Ministry
Ms. Fischer is founder and director of The School of Supernatural Children’s Ministry (aka SSCM). SSCM is a 45 hour training course which teaches parents and children’s ministers the basics of great Spirit-empowered children’s ministry. It also shows them how to teach children to hear God’s voice, become worshipers, prayer warriors, prophetic spokesmen. It also teaches them to heal the sick, operate in the gifts of the Spirit, be led by the Spirit of God, and do signs and wonders. The goal of SSCM is to help kids become active members in the body of Christ while they are still children by training parents and children’s ministry leaders to equip the little ones.
Heal the sick, Hear god’s voice, do signs and wonders, become prayer warriors? WTF???
Oldbroad1 — Becky Fischer was a children’s ministry leader in the documentary “Jesus Camp”. She’s been teaching children ludicrous things for many years.
“Signs and wonders” for “prayer warriors” are par for the course with many Apostolic and Charismatic churches, unfortunately. It disturbs me that children are being indoctrinated with this nonsense.
A cute game. Scary that they think this shit is real.
Where are the parents. Why are they allowing this bullshit? Why do humans believe such foolishness? What does she get out of this. Money? Free trips to exotic locales?
PRETZELS for the poor? Gawd…
Am lost in the memories of the “good old days” of spiritual warfare and prophecy, when every word of this made complete sense to me. So glad I’ve become “nonsensical” and given this up!
However, I am fascinated by the concept of “prophetic pretzels.” That’s a new one to me! What kinds of pretzels are prophetic — the pretzel sticks? The big bread-like kind? How do they know? And what do they do to them that makes them prophetic? Why give them to the poor? Would love to hear the mumbo-jumbo justification for that!
Now, if they are the soft philly pretzels with mustard on them, that would TRULY be prophetic to me! Jesus please us, my mouth is watering.
So what happens when these kids that she has “taught” are unable to actually heal the sick or raise the dead? Do they just write off their failure as “not having enough faith”? Why has no one, after such a failure, come to his senses and said “Hey, maybe this is all just a load of crap?”
Let’s hope they reach the second conclusion — sooner rather than later.
It takes a lot of “failure” to admit to yourself that the prophecy wasn’t true, and/or that wasn’t “God’s voice” you were hearing. For me, it meant going through a dangerous and possibly life-threatening situation, all for nothing. But at least I was an adult with a variety of experiences. I also was on my own and could make my own decisions about leaving or staying. These kids are so vulnerable! I can only imagine the damage that will be done by the time they can gather the strength to leave.
All this abuse is not only condoned but paid for by the parents of these children. It makes me puke to know that a child must face this kind of min-blowing shitspray !
What the fuck is wrong with believers, you ask? Nothing whatsoever… they are getting their money’s worth and the children are being harmed, just as the Bible in the hands of gifted leaders intends. Praise gentle Jesus.