My wife and I have thirteen grandchildren, aged two to twenty-one. Three of our grandchildren are ages 16, 15, and 14. All three are intelligent kids, straight-A students. I have found it interesting and enjoyable to watch them grow up. They are now at that age where they are not adults, but neither are they children; conversant in the things of the world, yet without much real-world experience. All three of them read my blog. They peruse my bookshelves, trying to size up the man they call Grandpa. My grandchildren don’t know much about Bruce Gerencser, the preacher. I had left the ministry by the time they were born. The Grandpa they know is disabled, unable to drive, a man who is a curmudgeon who loves to talk about politics, religion, sports, and make snarky, sarcastic jokes. My oldest grandson, the fourteen-year-old, and I were in the garage looking for my Hitachi corded power drill the other day. I need it for a project we were working on in the house. The drill was nowhere to be found. In the space of a few seconds, I said, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 🙂 Evidently, one of my children “borrowed” the drill and hadn’t returned it (I’ve threatened to put RFID tags on my tools so I will know where they are.) That meant I had to use “the beast,” a 1/2 inch drive Black and Decker drill I have owned for twenty-five years. As we came into the house, my grandson said with a smile on his face to his father, “Grandpa said the “F” word five times in two seconds!” We all laughed . . . and then I said fuck again. 🙂
Yesterday, my oldest son was over with his family for dinner. Polly and I made: fried catfish, fried shrimp, hushpuppies, asparagus (from our garden), and coleslaw, complete with beer, pop, or unsweet iced tea. After dinner, I noticed my son was trying to straighten up the sign I recently put up over our liquor cabinet. I said, “what are you doing?” I then told him that I meant for it to be crooked on purpose.
My sixteen-year-old granddaughter and fourteen-year-old grandson were perplexed. The grandfather they knew NEVER hung up ANYTHING crooked. EVER! Their father grew up in a home where a tape measure, shims, plumb-bob, and a level were never far away. He and his siblings have “fond” memories of helping me perfectly align the pulpit in the church’s front and center. I mean, perfectly align. Welcome to Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder.
By the way, this is the first time I have ever deliberately hung something crooked. I doubt I will continue down this decadent path. 🙂
Why the crooked sign? I love its take on the Bible verse: as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. 🙂 The crooked sign also reminds me of how Polly walks when she has drunk too much wine. 🙂
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
And I had this dream about a white creationist evangelical (WCE) who died and showed up at the gates of heaven.
Peter: “Why should God let you into heaven?”
WCE: “Who are you? Where’s Jesus?”
Peter: “I’m his representative. You know, the rock on which he built the church. You have to talk to me first and I need you to answer the question: Why should God let you into heaven? Keep in mind this is ‘Final Jeopardy.’”
WCE: “I trusted Jesus as my savior, and I know Adam and Eve were real people. No Adam, no Jesus, you know.”
Peter: “Did you feed the hungry?”
WCE: “Well, I opposed abortion. I happily intimidated young women who were at the abortion clinic for an abortion. I showed up for anti-abortion protests, and I attended rallies in Washington D. C. to put pressure on the Supreme Court. A leaked draft on the day of my departure from Earth indicated that the Supreme Court was going to vote to abolish abortion. Oh, how I would have loved to have been there for that glorious moment of sticking it to the liberals!”
Peter: “Calm down. This is not really a place that’s big on a lot of excitement and loud talking. Did you give water to the thirsty?”
WCE: What do these questions have to do with getting into heaven? Look, I upheld the honor of God by opposing gay marriage. Gays are an abomination to the Lord. And I really hammered all those radicals who didn’t understand that boys should be boys and not transgender persons. I defended the bathrooms of America with all my heart.”
Peter: “Did you know that I once thought Gentiles were an abomination to the Lord. Then, in a dream, God said to me, ‘What God has made clean, you must not call profane.’ What a jarring idea. When I went to the church council in Jerusalem, my fellow apostles and I had a real argument about this idea. And then, we decided to accept Gentiles. Do you think that applying the Jerusalem Church’s solution to inclusion could have been a good model for dealing with gays? Ok. Sorry for the rant. I have another question. Did you show hospitality to strangers?”
WCE: “I did if they were godly people: you know, anti-abortion, anti-gay, anti-science, anti-history, American patriots. But immigrants? No! I was part of the Minutemen who patrolled our southern border to keep all those criminals out of our country. I don’t understand this ‘snowflake’ need to pamper illegal immigrants. You have to stand up for your rights, and our rights as true Americans are threatened by these criminals – our values were endangered. So of course I didn’t show hospitality to them. As a good Christian I defended nationalist, heteronormative, sexist, ablest, racist, and classist power because that’s what God demanded.”
Peter: “Did you clothe the naked?”
WCE: “Is this some kind of sex question. Why do you want to talk about ‘nekkid people?’ Have you no shame? This place is not a nudist colony, is it? Are there a bunch of free-love hippies wandering the grounds? Look, I protested the way women dressed so sensuously. Disgraceful, I tell you, disgraceful.”
Peter: “Did you care for the sick?”
WCE: “I wrote letters and signed petitions against Obamacare.”
Peter: “Did you know that the legislation was actually called the Affordable Health Care Act. Almost everyone favors ‘affordable.’ Everyone is in favor of ‘health,’ and who would ever oppose ‘care’? Did you forget that Jesus was a healer, the ‘great physician’? Do you remember the story of the man left for dead on the Jericho Road and the stranger who paid for his emergency room, hospitalization, and rehab? Again, did you care for the sick?”
WCE: “Why are you telling me all this Bible stuff? What’s that got to do with heaven? I was trying to stop socialism, man.”
Peter: “Hmmm. Well, did you visit the prisoners?”
WCE: “I stood up for law and order, capital punishment, and long sentences for drug offenders. Lock’em up, I say. I opposed BLM, CRT, ‘wokeness,’ and all those liberal socialists in Congress. The Dems are demons, I tell you, and they are in the sex slave business with children. Ungodly.”
Peter: “You have quite the resume. What else did you do?”
WCE: “I was a true patriot who defended the flag, the Pledge of Allegiance, prayer in schools, ‘In God We Trust,’ and ‘one nation under God.’ I would have sent those professional ballplayers to prison for kneeling during the national anthem. I gave money to David Barton, a godly man trying to destroy the First Amendment to the Constitution. He really looks great in that red, white, and blue suit! Speaking of the glorious red, white, and blue, where’s the American flag? Why isn’t it flying over this place?
Peter: “I should warn you that you seem to be conflating Americanism, nativism, sexism, and racism with Christianity. Is there anything else you would like to add?”
WCE: “Well, I did my part to keep the world addicted to fossil fuels. I tried to help people to see that women must be submissive to men. And I supported all the efforts to rewrite American history to get rid of those liberal notions of systemic racism.”
Peter: “You really have quite the resume.”
WCE: “Thanks! And there’s more. I tried to help people see that God created the world in six literal days, and that evolution is a lie of the devil. And since the public schools – the devil’s playground – are infected with evolutionism, I have worked to convince parents to send their children to fundamentalist schools, where they will be taught a biblically consistent curriculum, and where they will learn the truth about six-day creation and the 6000-year-old universe.”
Peter: What are you talking about? God gave you a brain, and this is the drivel you come up with?
WCE: “Oh, my, I forgot one of the most important of causes. I supported the Second Amendment to the Constitution. I believe in God and guns, lots and lots of guns. By the way, where are the armed guards, and why don’t you have a wall? My pastor told me that God loves walls, and that there was a huge wall in heaven, but I only see open spaces. Look, I know the line is getting long behind me, so let me sum up. God should let me into heaven because I believe in God, guns, the Bible, male superiority, and heteronormative white society. I believe in keeping America for real Americans, real patriots. I believe in the 4th of July as a Christian holiday, and the Pledge of Allegiance as the church’s creed. And I can’t wait to join the QAnon chapter here in heaven!”
Peter: “Oh my. Well, you can go through the door on the left. It’s a sort of holding pen for applicants with muddled answers. I will get back to you in a few million years with a final decision. In the interim I will register you for some remedial classes in science, history, and the Bible. Have a nice eternity. I need a break.”
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
But I want to argue that after wading through all of this nonsense, it is actually the mother who is the most responsible party in having an abortion. After all, the mantra, “my body my choice” should, if consistently applied, make that case.
….
However, mothers are in actuality the most responsible for this vile attack on the Image of God and hatred toward mankind. It is the mother who has veto power over her own body—remember, “my body, my choice.” It is the mother who is ultimately responsible for allowing the abortion to take within her body on the separate body in her womb. She is the ultimate protector of the unborn; it is a great responsibility. And with that responsibility comes accountability.
….
The only innocent victim in an abortion is the child who was murdered in the act.
So let’s stop with excuses. Under current law, no mother would be expected to be deemed innocent for choosing to murder her children.
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
Because of the culture being oversexualized, porn’s not a big deal. And if porn’s not a big deal, sexting’s not a big deal. If sexting’s not a big deal, sexual assault’s not a big deal. If sexual assault’s not a big deal, rape’s not a big deal, and all of a sudden we build a culture around the lie that sex is just this thing that happens between two people when they get together.
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
Joe, the Evangelical, continues to email me. The count is now up to twenty-five comments and twenty emails. Today, Joe emailed me at 12:19 pm, 12:29 pm, 12:46 pm, 1:34 pm, 1:54 pm, 4:06 pm, 6:17 pm, and 8:08 pm. Joe even went over to ex-christian.net and said:
I don’t know but thought I would drop in to say I am still investigating every angle of deconversion. An older ex-Christian named Bruce in Ohio just threw me off his board and told me to f&$#$k off! I remembered that the Moderator here has much thicker skin, and is far more respectful to people. The man in Ohio immediately took offense when I quoted 1 John 2:19. But I wasn’t the one stating what it says in the verse— John the Apostle was!
I have not responded to any of Joe’s emails today, and I don’t plan to do so. I do plan to address some of what he said later in this post.
Here’s what Joe — a man who thinks he is Jesus — had to say:
Email One
I should have known you would do this. You opened up a door for me to respond to you. I tried to be civil in my response to you. I even explained I never said you were going to hell. But you insist on painting me in the worst way possible, and still insist you have the right to tell another person to f$#$k off at your leisure. You have only reinforced by your posts the fact that reconverts are very, very angry people with malicious attitudes. I will also share your blog with others to show them how a deconverted man reacts to discussions about God. How his hate is the dominant force in his life. You lost your soul for sure when you turned from Jesus—you no longer have a heart. Hate consumes you and is hunting you down now. Praise God he has saved me and continued to keep me. I pray I never wind up like you.
Email Two
This will absolutely be my last email to you Bruce. One day this will be reviewed as everything else will be before the Judgment seat of Christ. You will realize on that day that MANY people have tried to persuade you to repent from your decision to deconvert. You will realize then how you have treated those same people. I don’t care what you say Bruce— I genuinely continued to post on your site not to snidely judge people but to hopefully warn them and cause them to turn. But you are too hateful to accept that. I think there are other “lurkers” on your site that will be amazed to see the amount of hate you have towards Jesus Christ. In trying to “reveal” me on your site you have truly revealed yourself. I hope they see that and turn back to Jesus, seeing what they will turn into if they continue to reject Jesus. You may have committed the sin in 1 John 5:16 and I pray others will read your posts and beware. I know your response to all of this: f&$&$k off! Unfortunately those are the main words in your vocabulary now. Hopefully I’ve made your board more interesting. I note the SEQUELS keep coming Bruce. Otherwise the board is quite predictable and boring. Narcissists normally do have quite boring boards. Yours is no exception.
Email Three
By the way, you continue to shoot yourself in the foot Bruce. It’s your blog but you are centering on ME. I’m very flattered. Will there be a Part 5 and 6 also. I’ll go get my popcorn.
Email Four
It’s time to ‘fess up. You’ve been played. That’s why I’ve repeated twice now that you’re shooting yourself in the foot. I was VERY surprised the last Deconversion board that I was on I was the one who left–I wasn’t “thrown off” like you are doing. lol.
That moderator was VERY COOL and kept his composure. He knew I would continue to make the claims I was making but allowed me to continue. There were no personal attacks between he and myself, but I could tell he was very angered at my saying he was never a believer. I expected to be cussed at and removed but he never did. I had written a thread called “Israel: proof of God’s existence”. It might appear if you Google it. I’ve forgotten the name of the site.
But every other site I have visited had the same result: make a few posts, suffer harsh criticism, a few begin to cuss at you (but I never cuss back), and eventually the moderator bans you, or takes away your rights to post.
When I stumbled onto your site about Halloween and realized you were a deconvert, I said to my wife “I’ll bet I get banned within a week”. LOL. You took away my posting rights within TWO DAYS.
The majority of you are very angry people. Just read the posts on your “I hate Jesus” thread Bruce. So it doesn’t take much to get most of you all riled up. There is the occasional Michael (whom I take seriously) who is cordial and civil. But the majority are just like you Bruce. Ever heard the term “thick skin”? Deconverts do NOT have thick skin. LOL.
I email you again and again to see how much more I can rile you up. Man, you’ve dedicated 3 threads to me due to your anger.
I showed the most recent addition to the thread, PART 3 to my wife and she said “you should stop doing that. Someone is going to have a heart attack”. But I told her it was too much fun watching the reactions I was getting. I told her that “These people hate Jesus so much they spend HOURS talking about it”. And you most certainly do.
And it is pure guilt. You are afraid and I don’t blame you. You are rejecting the Lord of eternity. It displays itself in your anger and repeated reassurances to one another that Jesus is all “make-believe”. But Hebrews 10:26-31 states you are “expecting fearful judgment” It is something you cannot shake off no matter how hard you try to.
But you have all made your own choice to “trample upon the Son of God” (Hebrews 10:27) so I will continue to “play you” Bruce.
Oh– did I just ruffle your little feathers by emailing you again? Whoops! LOL. “How dare he continue to email me? I am Bruce Almighty and I asked him not to!” Ha ha ha ha
Will this email be in Part 4? Please entitle it “I continue to shoot myself in the foot” followed by 4 eggplants shaped like penises. That would be great. Ha ha.
Email Five
Google: “Deconversion Israel proves the existence of God”. Scroll down about 6 links. This is where I posted as Fish153 for quite a while. It is www.ex-christian.net. The Moderator was amazing. Very patient person. I truly admire him. He allowed me to post many different things and was confident enough in his own skin to not take it personally or ban me. I eventually left the board on my own. But I was told to f$@#k off many times by those without thick skin. I would feign surprise at their actions, but would never return the cursing.
I left the board admiring the man for allowing ALL views. I leave your board laughing. Another one shoots himself in the foot! Lol.
Email Six
Sing it with me Brittany: “Oops I did it again. I emai-eld Bruce, and now he’ll get mad, and send those egg plants…”Hey I wanted to let you know I’m drumming up readers for your blog. I was on another deconvert blog where they have allowed me to continue for some time now. I mentioned you. I didnt give your full name. I just said “A thin-skinned ex-Pastor and ex-Christian from Ohio named Bruce threw me off his board for quoting 1John 2:19 and stating he was never a Christian”. These people are used to seeing 1 John 2:19 quoted and being told they were never Christians. It goes with the territory. I also mentioned you have given me top billing on your board— even making sequels in parts 2 and 3 (so far). So I’m sure some will come to visit very soon. I think it’s always nice to get more readers for a blog. It definitely cannot hurt. All the best to you!
Email Seven
This is Joe’s wife. He doesn’t know I am sending this. Please stop encouraging him. You said “if he emails me again I will post it below”. Of course he e-mailed you. You left a door open for him. I am pleading with you to stop. Ever since Joe was very young he has been extremely frightened of Santa Claus. He was frightened to the point of psychosis.
A couple of days ago my husband dashed into the living room in tears and cried out “Santa Claus just told me to fuck off!!”
I seriously did not know what he meant until I saw your picture. “Why? Why? Why would Santa Claus tell me to fuck off?? He asked me.
All I could tell him is that maybe Santa is frustrated. Maybe he can’t fit down a chimney any more.
I know you’re not Santa, but he thinks you are. After he saw your picture his psychosis returned. He is a sick man.
And then, to top it off you send eggplant emogis. Joe is allergic to two things: Eggplant and Ohio. We have to avoid Ohio because he breaks out in hives if he goes near there.
So I have to ask you. For the sake of my husband please cease and desist. Do not “invite” him to e-mail you again or he will most definitely. I am asking politely. Thank you for listening.
Email Eight
You know, I had read almost everything on your blog except “Dear Jesus”. Deconverts always say it was nothing personal in their lives that turned them away from God. They say it was because of something they read, or due to Science, etc.
But it ALWAYS turns out to be something in their lives that caused them to turn away. When I read “Dear Jesus” I now see clearly why you are an apostate. You “served” Jesus, but “blamed” Jesus your whole life.
Your Mom, the divorce–“where were you Jesus?” I understand now Bruce. I PROMISE to never send you another email. I have badgered you with emails because I was genuinely upset that a former “Pastor” would tell me to “f” off.
There is another site that I am visiting again. They are a bit more understanding. There are some quick to curse there also, but that is to be expected.
I wasn’t aware of your sad past.. I’m truly sorry. But I have a far better understanding for your deconversion now. “Dear Jesus” is a real eye-opener to those looking for reasons for deconversion. My past is also sad but I don’t blame God for it.
Good luck with your blog. I am deleting every link to your blog, and regret barraging you with e-mails. Now that I understand your reason for turning back I regret not stopping earlier.
— end of emails —
Joe’s comments speak for themselves. I do want to address several things.
First, The Life and Times of Bruce Gerencser is a blog, not a board.
Second, this is my personal blog. This blog has comment rules. Joe read these rules. He deliberately chose not to abide by these rules. He has no respect for me or the readers of this blog. I gave Joe rope to hang himself because I thought his comments (and emails) would be instructive, a reminder of the vile, ugly underbelly of Evangelical Christianity. Joe has certainly delivered.
Third, Joe has not read most of the 4,369 posts on this site. In fact, based on the server logs, Joe has read less than twenty posts.
Fourth, based on the server logs, this site has received no traffic from any of the ex-Christian sites.
If you have been reading this series of posts, it should be clear to you by now that Joe is a gaslighter, a liar, a bully, someone who isn’t used to someone standing up to him.
While Joe “apologized” in his last email, I don’t buy his apology, nor do I accept it. Joe is like an abusive husband who beats the shit out of his wife, abuses her with his words, and psychologically terrorizes her. And then, one day, he profusely apologizes to his wife, professes his love for her, promises to never, never abuse her again, and gives her $100 to buy a new dress. All is well, right? Nope. Days or weeks later, the husband abuses his wife again, a pattern of behavior that has been going on for years. Cause harm, apologize, cause harm, apologize, cause harm, apologize.
Joe tried to harm me, but failed. He tried to psychologically terrorize me, but failed. he tried to wound me, but failed. You see, contrary to what Joe says, I do have thick skin. Scores of “Joes” have come before Joe Sperling. I have been attacked and abused by God’s chosen ones over, and over, and over again. Years ago, Joe’s emails and comments would have caused harm. A decade of counseling has taught me how to deal with the Joes of the world. One way is to expose them, and that’s what I’ve done. Another way is to take their power away, the power to cause harm. And finally, putting people such as Joe in their place can be cathartic. I told Joe to “go fuck yourself,” not out of anger, but because I can. Joe can’t control what I say and that infuriates him.
Joe has repeatedly said he wouldn’t contact me again. We will see if he is a man of his word.
This is the last post in this series. Any further emails will be appended to this post.
Joe send me the following after this post was published:
Bruce– You tried to harm me and you succeeded. You tried to terrorize me and you succeeded. You tried to belittle me and you succeeded. Congratulations and goodbye.
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
What you have done to the least of these my brethren you have done to me”. That verse seems to imply Bruce that who you were really telling to f%#$k off is Jesus not me, because I belong to Jesus.
Despite telling me four times that he would stop contacting me, Joe continues to send me emails:
Being human my curiosity caused me to check back on your site tonight. I was surprised you had extended the thread to a “Part 2”. I am not “outraged” at all. Just still shaking my head a little in disbelief that you told me “f$#$k you Joe” and then “f%$%k off!” That was in no way warranted. In fact, I didn’t say anything about your mental health until AFTER you had cursed me. I was using sarcasm (as I am sure many who read my email could easily surmise) when I said I was writing a chapter for a book about Abnormal Psychology. That was purely tongue in cheek.
I was just very surprised that you would find it “easy” to address someone in that way. I had even posted a message for Michael because of his civility, and his taking the time to list (4) points he wanted me to consider. The only post that had caused a truly negative response was when I spoke of slavery to point out they had no formal education due to their being in chains, but were very wise people. Sage took offense that I used slavery in my analogy. I told her she was being “touchy”. She is entitled to say whatever she wants to say though, and I need to learn to use different analogies in the future. But I never once found it within my right to tell her or anyone else for that matter to “f$#%k off”!
A blog like yours is set up to allow discussions to take place, so I was very surprised that you “silenced” me so soon. And then on top of that thought you had the right to tell me to “f%$%k off.” I disagree with people but never feel I have the right to say something like that to them. I do appreciate your allowing me to post my thoughts though. It is YOUR blog so you can run it as you see fit. I am only sending this email because you said you would allow me one more.
By the way, I never said you were on your way to hell. I said I felt intense sadness that deconverts will “miss out” and feel deep embarrassment when standing before Jesus one day. I will not take back that thought. I DO feel intense sadness when thinking of that. I know you don’t believe in a Judgment seat, but I do. One of the “laws of physics” says something to the effect of “for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction” (again, just a paraphrase if I’ve gotten the quote wrong). You believe we all just die and that’s it. You see I think the “law” I mentioned above can also apply to the spiritual realm. Did Heinrich Himmler just “die” and everything about him is now gone? Perhaps you can believe that, but I cannot. His “actions” caused untold grief to thousands and thousands of people. I believe one day, before the Great White Throne he will be asked to explain why he did what he did, and will be judged for it. I think we ALL must stand before God and explain why we did what we did.
“What you have done to the least of these my brethren you have done to me”. That verse seems to imply Bruce that who you were really telling to f%#$k off is Jesus not me, because I belong to Jesus.
I will not contact you again. All I can do is hope that any of the deconverts on the board might think twice about their decision. I know that 99% will say there is no need to re-consider. But there might be that 1%. And as that famous line Jim Carrey says in “Dumb and Dumber” “so you’re telling me I still have a chance!!??”
God bless you.
Where, oh where do I begin? As you can see, Joe is just a poor, misunderstood bloke who didn’t do anything to warrant me telling him to “go fuck himself.” His words speak for themselves. Joe tries to paint himself as a victim. He states that he was surprised I “silenced” him so soon. 🙂 Uh, Joe left twenty-five comments and sent me a dozen emails. He more than said his piece, even after I asked him repeatedly to stop contacting me.
Joe believes he is Jesus, that when I told him to “fuck off” I was really saying these words to Jesus. No, Joe, I am telling YOU, flesh and blood Joe, to “go fuck himself.” Not Jesus. Jesus is a dead man. Why would I tell him to “fuck off.” Besides, I don’t have a problem with Jesus, It’s you, Joe, and others like you I have a problem with.
Joe thinks that his words on this site might “help” a few deconverts who read my writing — maybe one percent. I think I can confidently say that Joe has helped them, reminding them of how glad they are to be free of Jesus and away from those who say they speak on his behalf.
I replied to Joe’s latest email. Here’s what I had to say:
Trigger Warning to Joe. This email contains swear words.
Joe,
You seem to think I give a shit about what you think. I don’t. You’ve told me four times you wouldn’t contact me again, yet you continue to email me. Why is that?
Stop the gaslighting, Joe. Own your behavior instead of blaming everyone else for how people responded to you. Stop lying. I never told you that you could email me one more time. Why the fuck would I do that? You know I told you that you could leave one more comment, which you did. So, don’t even suggest I said I wanted to hear from you again.
I don’t buy for a moment your claim that you were being sarcastic about the book blurb and my mental health. You intended your words to wound.
You are supposedly a grown-ass man, Joe. You can’t handle someone telling you to “fuck off” in an email? Especially since my response to your behavior was warranted. You seem to think you can say and do whatever you want without people responding to you. Not on my blog. I’ve dealt with countless Joe Sperlings over the years. I refuse to let them bully me, attack my character, or shit all over my blog. You ran into the wrong atheist, dude.
You say you are a Christian. You say you are a follower of Jesus. Yet, your behavior is anything but Christian. What did Jesus tell you about how to treat your enemies? How would Jesus have responded if someone told him to “fuck off”? WWJD?
I intend to make our email interaction public. This allows my readers a look at how Evangelicals behave, exposing the ugly underbelly of Evangelicalism. You have done a good job advancing the cause of atheism.
If you want to continue to harass me, I suggest you start a blog. It’s free, takes five minutes, then you can deconstruct my life to your heart’s content.
Bruce Gerencser
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
As one might expect, the comments, 11,000+, have been quite entertaining. Evangelicals have attacked me in every way possible. (And there have been a number of complementary, supportive comments too.) I knew this would happen. After all, the video exposed Trumpist Pastor Greg Locke as a nutjob and conspiracy theorist. YouTube comments can be vicious. Jesus’ followers seem to set their Lord’s commandments aside when commenting on social media. That’s why they find Locke so appealing. He’s a vicious, nasty, violent liar. Personally, I find their comments quite entertaining (and sad), reminders of what lies in the heart of many Evangelicals.
Recently, a man (maybe a woman) left the following comment:
I am a former pastor who is a Satanic, gay atheist. 🙂
I AM a former pastor, and I am an atheist, but gay and Satanic? I am an atheist, so not only don’t I believe God exists, I don’t believe Satan/demons exist either. As far as being gay? Evidently, my rainbow-colored suspenders are a sure sign I’m g-a-y. 🙂 (I do occasionally wear them because I know they irritate the Hell out of Evangelicals. Other times, I wear them to show my support for the LGBTQ community. And, quite frankly, I like these suspenders. I have thirteen pairs of Perry Suspenders. I am a fashionista.) 🙂
Calling me “gay” is meant to be a slur, a way to personally attack me. Juvenile behavior by middle school boys who think it’s okay to call people fags, queers, or pussies. When, oh when, will God’s chosen ones grow up?
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
After I wrote Part One, Joe took to commenting on several posts on this site. You can check out his comments here, here, here, here, and here. All told, Joe left twenty-five comments before I cut him off.
I gave Joe one last opportunity to say whatever he wanted to say. After that, move on. I told him that I would approve no further comments from him. Joe tried to continue commenting, but I deleted his comments.
I stated in the comment section:
As sure as the sun comes up in the morning, give Evangelicals enough rope and they will reveal their true beliefs and character. I’ve seen it over and over and over again. Joe Sperling is the latest example of this.
As time went on and he got pushback from readers, his pronouncements became more aggressive. This is one of the reasons I typically only give Evangelicals one opportunity to comment. Joe wasn’t Revival Fires — a fucking low bar if there ever was one — so I extended to him commenting privileges. And sure as the sun comes up in the morning . . . 😂
I finally asked him to make one last comment and move on. Do you think he could do that?
Tonight, he sent me two emails. Here’s what he said:
“I’m not whining. All you had to is ask. However from now on when someone mentions Bruce G. I’ll think of a little kid sticking his fingers in his ears and running to another room to avoid hearing things he doesn’t like. lol. See ya later.“
“I’m sending from here in case the other didn’t go through. I’m not whining Bruce. All you had to do was ask. I’ll always remember you though as a little kid shoving his fingers into his ears and running away because he is hearing things he doesn’t like. lol. You are too much ha ha.”
Evidently, he thought I needed to hear this twice. I know I’m a little slow these days 😂😂
Well, you can probably figure out how I responded:
Go fuck yourself, Joe. You said your piece. I have no interest in talking with you further.
Let’s see if you can respect boundaries.
I quickly learned that Joe is a bully, someone who has no regard for personal boundaries.
What follows is a transcript of the emails he sent me and my responses:
Joe: Seriously— what makes you believe you can say something like that to someone and it’s totally OK? Is this how you normally address people you disagree with? I’m actually flabbergasted [sic]. Unbelievable.
I guess you’ll use this now with your laughing emojis. That’s cool. Be my guest. See ya.”
Bruce: No, I’ll just tell you again, Joe, fuck off 🍆🍆🍆🍆. Second request, don’t contact me again.
Joe: “Go f&$&#k yourself Joe? Really? For quoting 1John 2:19? And then you put up your own article where you allow someone to quote it once again? OK— carry on. I feel no need to curse you back. God bless you.”
Bruce: Once again, Joe, fuck off. Third request, please do not contact me.
Joe: “Can I have your permission to quote you? I’m writing a chapter for a book on abnormal psychology and your statement would fit in well. They ask to get approval first though. I probably wouldn’t include the four purple thingies, but your statement would work great as a segue into the next chapter. Let me know. And thanks!”
Bruce: “No, I’ll just tell you again, Joe, fuck off 🍆🍆🍆🍆. Fourth request, don’t contact me again.
You are officially being a passive-aggressive bully.
Thank you for proving exactly the kind of man you really are; someone who has no regard for boundaries; someone who thinks he can control how people respond to him.”
Today, I woke up to two more emails from Joe. I did not respond to them.
Joe: Bruce— you are too much. You tell me to f@#@#k off and then say it’s ME who is showing who they really are? You are the control freak not me. Whose “boundaries”? You are the one with the Blog. I won’t contact you again. But seriously Bruce, get some psychological help. If you think it is your “right” to tell people to f$#&$k off you have some SERIOUS mental problems.
Joe: I forgot to add one thing: you are shooting yourself in the foot Bruce. Anyone can clearly see YOU are being the bully not me. I will send no further emails. It’s hard NOT to respond when someone tells you to f#$&$k off. It’s called being human.
As you can see, Joe is a Jesus-loving, Bible-believing (but, not practicing) passive-aggressive bully. As Sage, a long-time reader and my friend (she encourages me to take up pole dancing as Santa, the Stripper) :), observed, Joe is skilled at gaslighting:
You are quite skilled at gaslighting. Someone takes offense to your analogy, and point out how it fails, then you respond by claiming they are the problem and they need fix their views. That is classic gaslighting – when someone questions you, attack them and try to belittle them. You even carry it over to a different post, praising one poster while belittling the other. Now Michael,is the “good” deconvert and Sage is the “Bad” deconvert.
I clearly understood the point you were making. I even gave you ways to make the same point without using slavery. But it appears you are so determined to defend yourself and your analogy that you justify any type method to dismiss Sage. I have called you out as judgemental. I haven’t attacked you personally, I’ve attacked your analogy. You respond by attacking me personally, belittling me, gaslighting me, dismissing me and hope that doing so will destroy my point, or leave me unable to argue with you
I made a good faith effort to respond to and interact with Joe. He “seemed” like a decent Christian. However, after fifteen years of responding to countless Joes, I know that decent, thoughtful Evangelicals are few and far in between. Such people are typically “nice” until they are challenged or someone says something they don’t like. Then they reveal their true character. Such was the case with Joe. His comments became more hostile, more personal. I tried, as did others, to correct his factual errors, to no avail. Joe knows what he knows, end of discussion. Joe began his interaction with me saying that I never was a Christian and I was headed for Hell, and his interaction with me ended the same way.
Joe’s upset that I told him to “go fuck himself.” Tough shit. No one is going to control what I say or the language I use. I rarely tell people to “fuck off,” but in Joe’s case, it was warranted. Occasionally, a reader will object to me using curse words. Evangelicals, in particular, seem to have their freaking 🙂 sensibilities offended when someone tells them to go fornicate with themselves. I suspect there are times that I deliberately tell Evangelicals to “fuck off” because I know doing so riles them up. I do the same with some of my letters to the editor of the local newspaper. I call it “poking the bear.” Poked Evangelicals will quickly show that they are not Holy Spirit-controlled or following in the steps of Jesus. In Joe’s case, I was genuinely angered by his personal attacks on me, his refusal to accept my story at face value, and his unwillingness to admit that he was wrong. I corrected him three times, using facts and evidence easily found on the Internet, but Joe just doubled down and refused to admit he had erred.
I’ve dealt with scores of Joes over the years. In that time, I have taken various approaches to the Joes of the world: full engagement, limited engagement, or I just ignore them. I respond to every email I receive — thousands of them over the past fifteen years. In Joe’s case, I answered numerous emails from him before saying “enough.” I was thoughtful, honest, and open until he became aggressive and started making things personal. It was then, and only then, that I told him to “go fuck himself.” Joe asking to quote me in a book (a story I don’t believe is true) was nothing more than a threat of exposure. I am a public figure, so Joe is free to write or say anything he wants about me. I am quoted in several books written by Evangelicals. None of them asked me for permission to quote me (nor did they let me know they had done so). I am a big believer in personal responsibility, so I own my words; all of them, including telling someone to “fuck off.” Have I ever said things I shouldn’t have? Yep, and in every instance, I have owned my words, apologized, and, if warranted, changed what I had written. But, apologizing for telling a passive-aggressive bully and gaslighter to “fuck off”? Not a chance . . .
Joe’s ultimate attack came when he suggested I have mental health problems. Why? Because I told him to “go fuck himself.” 🙂 🙂 🙂 Joe doesn’t care about my mental health. If he did, he would have behaved differently. Regular readers know, of course, that I have been seeing a secular psychologist for a decade. Not one time have I been told that I needed to clean up my gosh darn 🙂 language. (Please see Evangelical Swear Words.) I just talked to my therapist today. We talked about real stuff; you know: gastroparesis, fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis, chronic pain, trauma, and how my Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) upbringing caused untold trauma and harm, to me, my wife, and my grown children. You know, REAL issues.
I am sure Joe won’t like what I have written here. I’m sure he will send me at least one email to register his outrage. If he does, I will post his email below.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate your love and support.
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
As I’ve written and pressed on this matter repeatedly, voting Democrat is a very likely indicator that one has not been born again. The argument goes: God isn’t a Democrat or a Republican, so it doesn’t really matter. Well, quite frankly, that’s just stupid. No Christian in their right mind would argue that God is a politician. But God does have a moral law that he expects Christians to uphold and the Democratic party was fundamentally designed to oppose it.
The Democratic party, at its core, is radically opposed to the standard of morality set forth in Scripture. Whether it be the continual expansion of the slaughtering of innocent children in the womb, the clamoring for the promotion of homosexuality and other forms of sexual perversions, including feminism, or the insistent push for redistributive theft, it goes without saying that everything the Democrat party stands for is biblically immoral. Jesus did not die for these things, he died because of these things–to free us from them.
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So let’s spell this out for those who aren’t getting it: This means you cannot be a Christian while supporting the slaughter of innocent children, gay rights, gay propaganda, “gay Christianity,” theft (redistribution of wealth), lawlessness (i.e. open borders), a complete and total lack of individual responsibility (i.e. nanny state welfare system, single-payer insurance, etc.), or the endless sweeping away of our right to worship God freely. If you support this godless ideology, or support candidates that do, don’t expect me to treat you as a fellow Christian.
Bruce Gerencser, 64, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 43 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
