Today, I received the following email from an Evangelical woman named Melissa Lord. My response is indented and italicized. All spelling, grammar, and punctuation in the original.
I was raised in church, and I had no intentions, whatsoever, to becoming a Christian. However, when I was 25 years old, I did become a Christian and forward saved me. I totally understand you, because I have seen so much hypocrisy in my life, which is why the word of God tells us not to look to man, because who can no the heart because it is desperately wicked. I do not have confidence in men, because I’ve seen too much.
Lord says that she “totally understands me.” This is hyperbole, at best. How could Lord possibly “totally understand me?” She doesn’t know me, outside of reading one or more posts on this site. She is a passerby who thinks she understands me by reading a few of my posts. I can confidently say that she doesn’t, and that even my partner of almost forty-six years and my therapist don’t totally understand me. Sadly, we live in a day when people think they can know and understand someone in 2,000 words or less.
I don’t believe that I have ever said that “hypocrisy” was a primary motivator for my deconversion. It wasn’t. I wasn’t out of elementary school before I learned that people could be hypocrites. My parents, pastors, teachers, and other adult authority figures were hypocrites. As a fourteen-year-old boy, I watched my church’s assistant pastor beat the shit out of his son with a belt for getting bad grades. The same man stood in the pulpit on Sundays and preached up godly living. Hypocrisy abounds, and it played very little part in my deconversion.
And if anyone is wondering if I am a hypocrite, the answer is no. 🙂 I mean yes. I assume all of us can be hypocritical at one time or the other.
However, I will have confidence in the Lord Jesus Christ until the day I die, because, while seeing so much hypocrisy, I have seen, and been friends with witnessed the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, in so many lives.
And I don’t, because of the reasons mentioned in the posts found on the WHY? page. I wonder if Lord read any of these posts?
I read your article regarding Gus Harter. I knew of him, and a People that liked him. I met him, and wasn’t crazy over him from the first time I saw him. I did not see him as a pervert, but I did not feel any godliness from him. Satan knows the bible. Many, so called, creatures also know the Bible, and will get behind a puppet and try to preach, but with no fervency behind it.
Welp, I was quite a fervent preacher and know the Bible quite well — likely better than you do. I was a godly man, a devoted follower of Jesus. Yet, I am now an atheist. Why is that? Further, how can you “feel” godliness from someone else — especially someone you met for the first time? I am sure you see yourself as “godly,” but how can any of us “feel” this? All that matters to me is behavior. Harter was a pervert because of what he did. I would ask that you judge me based on my behavior, my good works. I think if you carefully do so, you will find out that I am a good man; not perfect, but certainly as good as, if not better, than many card-carrying, Bible-believing Christians.
I do understand you, but if you know the scripture, you would know “not” to pit confidence in any man. That is where people fall. We are to keep iur eyes on the Lord.
As I stated above, you do not understand me. You can’t, because you don’t know anything about me. Please stop with the superficial judgments and conclusions. To quote Proverbs 18:13: Answering before listening is both stupid and rude. I really wish Evangelicals would try to understand my story before hitting “send.”
I am a humanist, so I have no choice but to put my confidence in my fellow human beings. When I go to the doctor, I put my confidence in the training and skills of my physician. I do this numerous times every day. I don’t put my eyes on the Lord for one simple reason — he’s dead. Jesus died 2,000 years ago and lies buried somewhere in an unknown grave. I’ve seen no evidence for anything other than Jesus being dead. This goes for all of us, by the way. None of us escapes death, as every cemetery in existence testifies.
I know you said you left the faith, so maybe you’re an apostate, I don’t know.
You don’t need to “know.” I told you I was Christian for most of my life; that I was saved, baptized, and called to preach at the age of fifteen; that I devotedly followed Jesus for thirty-five years. In 2008, I deconverted — leaving the faith, never to return. I am an apostate, a reprobate, or maybe I am still a Christian — once saved, always saved, right?
Please accept my story at face value, and I will do the same for you. When someone says they are a Christian, I believe them. All I ask is that Evangelicals do the same when I say once was a Christian, and now I am not.
I can only hope and pray that you come to know the Lord Jesus, for yourself, and for the sake of your family. I know when it comes your time to die, and you will, that you, surely don’t want your children to see you die without the Lord. If you don’t believe, now, you certainly will immediately after death.
Ah yes, what’s an email from an Evangelical without a passive-aggressive threat about death, judgment, and Hell? As if such threats have any impact on me. Thousands of threats later, I am still an unrepentant atheist.
Lord says she knows that when it comes my time to die, I won’t want my children to see me die without Jesus. My partner, most of our children, and most of our grandchildren are unbelievers too. I suspect they will lament my passing, but I doubt any of them will worry about me burning in Hell. The only people who will make any noise about my passing will be Evangelicals letting everyone know that “Bruce Gerencser knows the truth now!” I can only imagine the blog posts that will be written and sermons preached about my demise and residence in Hell. I hope my surviving blog readers will defend my honor. 🙂
Lord worries that I don’t believe her — I don’t, I have heard nonsense like hers countless times — but warns me that the moment I die and land in the flames of Hell that I will know she was right. No, I won’t. Why? Duh, I will be dead. 🙂
I will pray for you, and your children, as I pray for mine.
Sincerely,
Melissa Lord
Pray if you must, but keep it to yourself. You know, as Jesus commanded you to do. No need to let me know you are praying for me. If God answers your prayers, I will be the first to know.
My partner, children, and grandchildren do not need prayer. They are fine just as they are — even my demon-possessed four- and six-year-old grandsons are awesome just as they are. 🙂
Saved by Reason,
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