I answer every email I receive, even those from Evangelicals. Some days, as you shall see in a moment, I wonder why I bother. What follows is the email interaction I had with Larry, an Evangelical Christian from Canada.
Enjoy! 🙂
Larry:
Hi Bruce,
Just as comment I feel your site leaves little room to discuss who we are and why we are here.
I can only say whatever has influenced you was real to you and I am sorry the beginning of your life was not what you expected, but I hope what you have left will bring you some blessings of acceptance of others who do not believe as you do.
Sincerely; Larry, a person caring about others much as I care about myself.
Bruce:
Everyone, including nasty, arrogant, hateful Evangelicals are free to say anything they want in one comment. If they show they can play well with others, they will be given an opportunity to comment again. So, I have no idea what you are complaining about.
What makes you think I don’t accept people who believe differently from me?
Larry:
I wasn’t complaining just don’t understand what you are complaining about?
You obviously don’t accept anyone who claims God just wondering who that hurts you or them?
I am open to any comment and I do not hate your for any thing.
Bruce:
Evangelicalism is inherently harmful. I have fleshed out the reasons for this claim numerous times over the years.
My blog affords me an opportunity to tell my story and critique Evangelicalism (and the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist church movement). My target audience is people who have doubts about Christianity or who have left Christianity.
You said “your site leaves little room to discuss who we are and why we are here.” That simply is not true. Every reader gets at least one opportunity to comment — even Christian assholes. I answer every email I receive, and I receive lots of them, most of which are negative or hostile. Thus, I am at a loss to understand your complaint.
I have Christian friends. Tomorrow, I will have dinner with two Christian pastors. I have been doing so monthly for two years. I have Christian family members, including some of my children. So, your claim about not accepting Christians (or people from other faiths) is not true. That said, my blog belongs to me. I get to choose who I want to interact with. Since most Evangelicals are nasty, arrogant, and abusive towards me, I hope you will forgive me for not giving them the time of day (outside of exposing the bankruptcy of their “faith.”) As long as Evangelicals cause harm, I plan to speak out against their beliefs and practices. They have taken over the Republican Party, tried to overthrow the government on January 6, and are waging a jihad against LGBTQ people, women who need abortions, and people of color. These things matter, yes?
Larry:
Yes all people matter, even those who do not care about you or I.
We can all be assholes, that is just another name given as hate to those who disagree with others.
People are people not Gods. Anyone can claim that are do thing for God but God is real or he is not. If some thinks he does exist he won’t exist to them, so why blame anyone for their own unloving characters as if God caused it.
Is that what you want people to now, just asking?
Bruce:
Sorry, Larry, “asshole” is an objective term. We all can be assholes at times, but some people are assholes 24-7, as emails to me and comments on my site clearly show. This is not about disagreement, it’s about character. Try walking in my shoes: threats of judgment and hell, death threats, threatening to harm my wife or daughter with Down syndrome . . . every vile thing imaginable has been said to me by so-called followers of Jesus. So, spare me the false equivalence.
“God” turns some people in bad people. Again, all you have to do is read my blog to see the evidence for this claim. I don’t let these assholes hide in the shadows. I publicize their “works” for all to see.
I don’t understand your question.
Larry:
Thanks for the clarification.
Anyone can choose to believe there is a God or there is no God.
One thing for sure God guarantees if anyone earnestly seeks him, they will find him and know him.
Very simple, easy and it definitely can only be our own decision by our own minds and hearts not others.
Those who attack you may be foolishly replying to your remarks like calling them ”assholes”. Anger is still anger but to refer them as being leader from God also attacks God.
God turns no one into anything or he would only be the devil.
God gave all of us a freewill choice in his image and we all choose to be what we are and how we treat others.
I am not asking a question I am replying to your invitation you give on your site and I have accepted you in love as I love myself.
I do not like being talked down to but I know God is real, not by others examples but as he said he is.
Your open so I came to let you know looking at others will never show the truth God there really is.
Your blessed with some much more than others in deeply sad fearful lives like wars and famines.
People who call other names, God will judge them not me.
Bruce:
sigh
You are not listening, you are “preaching.” I am an atheist, so any discussion about God/Satan is a waste of time. I simply don’t care.
You said, Those who attack you may be foolishly replying to your remarks like calling them ”assholes”. I told you why they attack me, yet you ignore this and justify the atrocious behavior of your fellow Christians. Good job, Larry.
You wrongly think I am “open” to the bullshit you are peddling. I assure you, I am not.
We are done here.
Larry:
You have a site on worldwide internet, and you open to anyone as you have even said by your own choice, stop your site and all will be well.
Then go back and seek God and his love that will never condemn you, is that not worth seeking and knowing, my friend Bruce?
The others are in God’s hands also for he guarantees it.
Bruce:
Fuck off, Larry.
Thank you for not listening to one word I had to say.
You came to my site looking for info on Jack Hyles. You made no effort to read any of my autobiographical material. I assume, then, you had an agenda, not understanding and interaction.
Why would I go back and seek a mythical being, Larry? Do you realize how absurd you sound? Your religious babbling only works with people who believe. I don’t.
And you most certainly are not my friend.
Larry:
Thanks Bruce,
I read a lot and I love you as I love myself.
You believe or you would not be so angry.
Just another syrupy, passive-aggressive discussion with an Evangelical Christian only interested in preaching and evangelizing. What’s new, right?
Larry says he read a lot of my writing, but the server logs say he read one post about Jack Hyles before sending me an email. He may have read other posts, but I doubt it. Evangelicals lie about what they have read on this site all the time. Lots=two posts. Everything=five posts. If Larry extensively read my writing, his emails do not reflect it. Just once, I wish such people would read the posts on the WHY? page before emailing me or commenting. Instead, they practice Proverbs 18:13: Answering before listening is both stupid and rude. Just remember, God said it, I didn’t. 🙂
I am sure some readers wonder why I bother answering emails and comments from the Larrys of the world. Doing so is largely a waste of time. Sometimes, however, I can reach someone, leading to them questioning their sincerely held beliefs. Any move away from Fundamentalism is a good one. Other times, these discussions provide fodder for this blog, shining a bright light on how Evangelical behave towards atheists, agnostics, and other believers. People such as John, James, Jim, David Tee, Lonnie, Larry, and a cast of thousands reveal the ugly, vicious underbelly of Evangelical Christianity. I have received enough of these emails and comments over the past fifteen years to conclude that these people are not just a few bad apples or crazy uncles. Like it or not, Evangelical beliefs and practices turn some Christians into hateful, meanspirited people; people who take pleasure in condemning people to Hell; people who revel in savagely attacking LGBTQ people; people who have no capacity to understand or accept people different from them.
That said, there are a handful of Evangelicals who regularly comment on this site. Some of them have been commenting for years. Scores of other Evangelicals faithfully read my writing. I am grateful for their love and support. If only most Evangelicals were like them, I suspect I would have a much better view of Evangelicalism. Not that I am going to return to the fold. That ship has sailed. For these Evangelicals, friendship in this life is enough for them. They are content to let God sort out things after death (as am I). Are they really Evangelicals? That’s for them to say. I generally accept how people self-identify. People have many and varied reasons for wearing the Evangelical moniker. Labels don’t matter much to me anyway, behavior does. I am always grateful for Evangelicals who put their humanity first.
Bruce Gerencser, 67, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 46 years. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
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Larry, you are wrong, completely and utterly wrong, when you state “Anyone can choose to believe there is a God or there is no God.”
Belief is not a choice. I can’t “choose” to believe in the badly-written, cartoonish god of the Bible. I can’t even pretend to believe – I’d know instantly that I was attempting to lie to myself, which is not a healthy thing to do to oneself.
Neither is my disbelief a conscious choice. I’ve been this way all my life.
And how is someone supposed to know if the god they’ve imagined into existence is really there? With few exceptions, people have an internal dialogue going on throughout their waking hours. It really isn’t much of a leap to relabel some of those thoughts and imagine that one is hearing the voice of a god.
Finally, how dare you call Bruce (or any other Internet stranger) your friend! Friendship is a two-way relationship, not something that you can declare unilaterally without the explicit consent of the other party. Stop it, and don’t do it again.
(Oh, and stop bearing false witness about what other people believe or don’t believe, too. I profoundly doubt that you can read others’ minds.)
Astreja, I was about to respond in exactly the same way (as I always do) that we can’t “choose” what we believe. I could try and believe that I have a Rolls-Royce motor car in my garage but that is not going to make it true! I can try and believe that the earth is flat or that Trump won the last election, but neither would be true. I once did believe in God, when I was young and naïve, but now I’m older and a little wiser.
I also dislike the way that evangelicals implicitly claim superiority to Bruce. By starting a sentence ‘I’m sorry that this happened to you’, in this context suggests they are saying ‘but if you were like me’, etc. Bruce may have health challenges but he is free psychologically, whilst evangelicals continue voluntarily to remain shackled.
I found it difficult to follow what Larry was saying. I don’t feel like his grammar and spelling are shining points in his writing. And he didn’t actually respond to you, but kept saying what he wanted to say, without actually interacting. Preaching, not conversing, and not a very good preacher at that.
It took me a bit to figure out his agenda. I must be getting slow 😂😂
Larry: “One thing for sure God guarantees if anyone earnestly seeks him, they will find him and know him.”
Zoe: And, there it is. Time to evangelize. It was only a matter of time. 🙂
“You believe or you would not be so angry”. -Larry
Larry, that is simply not true. You are not listening to Bruce, not reading the messages he is trying to tell you, both through his emails and through his blogs. It is CLEAR to anyone who reads Bruce’s posts that he does not believe in deities. Any of them. He is angry when people try to turn his story into something that suits THEIR narrative rather than listening to Bruce’s narrative. Many of us ex-Christians (ex-Muslims, ex-Jews, ex-Hindus, etc.) are angry when religious people refuse to listen to what we are saying in truth. My truth is that I no longer believe in deities, and I don’t like it when religious people won’t accept my story as my truth. You like Jesus? Cool. I do not question that your truth is that you’re happy with your religion. Good on you. It isn’t something for me. Live and let live. My belief system allows me to do that because I don’t believe in a deity that will throw you into eternal torment for wrong belief, so I don’t feel the need to go around trying to convince others that a certain deity is real and needs expressed fealty. Let’s respect each other and move on, ok, Larry?
Larry—Saying things like “anyone can choose to believe in God” and “You believe or you would not be so angry” makes you seem awfully patronizing and condescending. In other words, you show no respect for Bruce or anyone else to whom you say such things. Do you wonder why Bruce responded to you as he did?
Then again, you probably don’t understand that it’s impossible to say, in effect, that someone should believe as you believe if you are actually willing to accept the fact that you don’t know someone else’s reality as well as that person knows it. In short, you can’t say what you’ve said and claim to have any sort of respect for the person to whom you’ve said it.
Bruce knows the Bible and his life better than you ever will. If you can’t accept that, leave him the fuck alone.