I spent decades in the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) church movement, from the early 1960s until the late 1990s. I attended Midwestern Baptist College, an IFB institution, in the 1970s. I continue to follow the IFB movement closely, reading scores of blogs and websites, and listening to far too many Fundamentalist sermons and podcasts. All that hellfire and brimstone preaching, and I am still not saved. 🙂 My wife’s family is IFB through and through. Polly’s dad was an IFB pastor, as was her uncle Jim Dennis. (Please see The Family Patriarch is Dead: My Life With James Dennis.) Several family members are pastors, missionaries, and evangelists. We have great-nephews and grand-nieces who are currently attending or plan to attend unaccredited IFB colleges. Last Sunday, we listened to a podcast where one of our grand-nieces was sharing her plans for after high school. She plans to attend an IFB college so she can become a school teacher. How sad, both Polly and I said. ________ is a wonderful girl. She’s going to spend the next four years getting a worthless education, one that’s only good if she teaches at an IFB school. Numerous young relatives have received similar training, convinced by their parents that this is what “God” wants them to do. I have said all of this to say that I continue to have my finger on the pulse of IFB church movement.
I have written countless articles about the IFB church movement since I started blogging in 2007. I am well-known in some corners of IFB world. As a result, I have received a lot of emails and comments from offended, outraged, angry, nasty, vile, vicious, hateful IFB zealots. From death threats to attacks on my character to threats of judgment and Hell, IFB zealots have tried to marginalize me and my story — unsuccessfully, I might add.
I have found that IFB zealots are experts in passive-aggressive behavior. Yesterday, I received an email from a woman from Alabama named Donna.
Here’s what he had to say:
Hi Bruce!
Hope this warms your heart, I am NOT praying for you.
I will not be concerned if I don’t hear from you for a while, or at all.
Matter of fact, I wouldn’t read your response if you did so don’t waste your time.
Enjoy your life while you can.
Best to you and your wife.
Now that’s one passive-aggressive email.
I replied:
Donna,
I have no idea who you are. Your email is quite passive-aggressive. Was that your intent?
I see you came to my site looking for information on Pastor Mark Falls from the Newark Baptist Temple in Heath, Ohio. If you didn’t like something I said about Falls, you could have commented on the relevant post. Instead, you took the typical approach most Independent Fundamentalist Baptists (IFB) take with me: nasty, spiteful, passive-aggressive, complete with a subtle threat of judgment and Hell.
Please square the content of your email with the teachings of the Bible, especially the verses that tell you how to treat your enemies.
Be well.
Bruce Gerencser
I have no idea who this person is. Mark Falls is an Alabama native and pastored in the state, so Donna could be a relative or a former church member. Falls currently pastors the Newark Baptist Temple in Heath, Ohio, a church previously pastored by Polly’s uncle, Jim Dennis, for over forty years. Polly’s mom attends Newark Baptist. She’s been a member of the church for forty+ years.
I’ve written several posts about Falls:
Dear Pastor Mark Falls, My Wife’s Mother Doesn’t Have Nine Lives
An IFB Funeral: Fundamentalist Christianity Poisons Everything
Donna did not respond to my email.
Bruce Gerencser, 67, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 46 years. He and his wife have six grown children and sixteen grandchildren. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. Bruce left the ministry in 2005, and in 2008 he left Christianity. Bruce is now a humanist and an atheist.
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That email is completely bizarre. “Hi, I’m emailing but I don’t care if you answer?” Someone seems to have a problem and it’s not Bruce.
Some great posts you’ve linked at the end, Bruce. I especially appreciate the ‘fundamentalist Christianity poisons everything’ because it says so well how just about all occasions/days/meetings can be poisoned by believers proselytizing. My older brother called to wish me a slightly early happy birthday and we had a good meet together talking about the war wounds of adding decade after decade to life, the family news, some plans for the near-term and after a very pleasant hour or so he launched into The Datribe after I shared that I stay away from Facebook and some of the social media because ‘it just causes alot of conflict with others’. Brother answers, ‘Well, I’m on Facebook but not to state my own opinions but to do the Lord’s work! I’m glad my mother didn’t kill me in the womb and no woman has the right etc. etc. ‘ Suddenly the whole pleasant hour was a bag of shite. I was silent, told him thanks for remembering me and hung up, feeling sad. He knows very well how I feel and stomps all over me just the same… for his wicked, vengeful shithead God…. But not really, brother. You use God because you are a bully and cannot stop being one even in your seventies.
Bruce, my family is exactly like yours, full of preachers, missionaries and young people whose minds are blown with hateful love delusions… Christianity poisons everything. I like to observe people exiting churches, going in the right direction. As for passive-aggressive Donna, I trust she has no children to harm.
As a former Southerner, born and raised, I can attest to the fact that we were taught the art of passive-aggressiveness from day one. Fun stuff.
Poor donna, she’s terrified of being responsible for what she says. So she runs from any response. Always good to know that Donna knows her god doesn’t have her back.
What a spiteful e-mail Donna sent to you! No sign of that famous “Christian” charity to be found, or forbearance. Plus that “Best to you and your wife” at the end. Now that’s the sour icing flung on this flat soufflé. Donna needs to do a little soul searching and try to practice the Christian ethos she so totally fails at doing here.
Donna from Alabama knows the Southern Lady Code. The Southern Lady Code says, “If you don’t have something nice to say, say something not nice in a very nice way.” That “Best to you and your wife” at the end reminds me of a Southern sorority president saying to her fellow Gamma Phi Betas about a prospective pledge she didn’t want, “I think she would shine brighter in another house.”
I often wonder if the people who are so quick to shit on you via email are really vile assholes in person or if they hide it and save it for private. Pretty sure that’s exactly what’s going on… they hide their true nature and put on a friendly face in person. Donna is a backstabbing scunt, actually. And add her gawd to the mix… EVERY time you post one of these emails I am grateful all over again that I saw the light and escaped from the christian worldview.