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Category: Evangelicalism

Songs of Sacrilege: Christmas Time in Hell by the South Park Team

christmas time in hell

This is the one hundred ninety-ninth installment in the Songs of Sacrilege series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. If you know of a song that is irreverent towards religion, makes fun of religion, pokes fun at sincerely held religious beliefs, or challenges the firmly held religious beliefs of others, please send me an email.

Today’s Song of Sacrilege is Christmas Time in Hell by the South Park Team.

Video Link

Lyrics

Satan: Well I tell you what,
Maybe we’ll have ourselves a little Christmas, right here.
C’mon everyone, gather `round!

String up the lights and light up the tree
We’re going to make some revelry
Spirits are high, so I can tell
It’s Christmas time in hell!

Demons are nicer as you pass them by
There’s lots of demon toys to buy
The snow is falling and all is well
It’s Christmas time in hell!

There goes Jeffery Dahmer,
With a festive Christmas ham
After he has sex with it,
He’ll eat up all he can.

And there goes John F. Kennedy
Caroling with his son
Reunited for the holidays
God bless us, everyone!

Everybody has a happy glow
Let’s dance in blood and pretend its snow
Even Mao Tse-Tung is under the spell
It’s Christmas time in hell!

Adolf, here’s a present for you.

Hitler: Oh? O Tannenbaum!

Satan: Yes, O Tannenbaum!

God cast me down from Heaven’s door
To rule in hell for evermore
But now I’m kinda glad that I fell
‘Cause It’s Christmas time in hell!

Here’s a rack to hang the stockings on
We still have to shop for Genghis Kahn!
Michael Landon’s hair looks swell!
It’s Christmas time in hell!

There’s Princess Diana
Holding burning mistletoe
Over poor Gene Siskel’s head
Just watch his weenie grow!

For one day we all stop burning
And the flames are not so thick
All the screaming and the torture stops
As we wait for old Saint Nick!

So string up the lights and light up the tree
We’re damned for all eternity
But for just one day all is well
It’s Christmas time in hell!

We’ve got to toast together, and make it quick!
We’ve gotta make room for Andy di*k.
Wake his mother and ring the bell

It’s Christmas time…

(Christmas time… Christmas time… Christmas time…)

Christmas time…

(Christmas time… Christmas time… Christmas time…)

It’s Christmas time in hell!

Merry Christmas Rooming House!

Independent Baptist Songs: What a Day That Will Be by Jim Hill

jim hill

From time to time, I plan to post lyrics from the songs we sang in the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) churches I grew up in and pastored. Unbelievers and non-Fundamentalists might find some of these lyrics quite interesting, and, at times, funny or disturbing. Enjoy!

Today’s Independent Baptist Song is What a Day That Will Be by Jim Hill. I was able to find a video of this song being sung by The Gospel Plowboys. I also found a video of Jim Hill singing the song with Bill Gaither and Friends.

What a Day That Will Be talks about what awaits Christians some day in Heaven (the Promised Land). Is this not the draw of Christianity? The promise of no more heartaches, no more tears, no more sorrows, no more sickness, no more pain, no more losing loved ones and, strangely according to Hill, no more  clouds. Without these promises, Christian churches would be empty. The Apostle Paul said in 1 Corinthians 15:16-19:

For if the dead rise not, then is not Christ raised: And if Christ be not raised, your faith is vain; ye are yet in your sins. Then they also which are fallen asleep in Christ are perished. If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable.

If this life is all there is, says Paul, then our lives are most miserable. Paul, of course, was wrong, as countless atheists and non-Christians can attest, but Christians believe Paul is right; that promises of eternal life and rewards beyond the grave are what make this present life worth living.

What a Day That Will Be was one of my favorite songs. Polly and I sang it numerous times in church, and it was a must sing song when we took road trips. (Polly and I spent countless hours singing gospel songs as we traveled here and there with our family. )

What a Day That Will Be by Jim Hill

There is coming a day when no heartaches shall come
No more clouds in the sky, no more tears to dim the eye.
All is peace forevermore on that happy golden shore,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

Chorus
What a day that will be when my Jesus I shall see,
And I look upon His face,
The One who saved me by His grace;
When He takes me by the hand
And leads me through the Promised Land,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

There’ll be no sorrow there, no more burdens to bear,
No more sickness, no pain, no more parting over there;
And forever I will be with the One who died for me,
What a day, glorious day that will be.

Video Link

Video Link

About Jim Hill

Jim Hill was probably best known for his composition of “What A Day That Will Be.” His career as a singer spanned accross decades with tenures with The Golden Keys Quartet, The Stamps Quartet, The Statesmen Quartet, and in later year he enjoyed being part of the Gaither’s “Homecoming Series.”

Jim was a long-time member of Towne Blvd. Church of God where he served as worship minister and choir director for many years.

Black Collar Crime: Evangelical Pastor Phillip Buckson Accused of Impregnating Teenager

phillip buckson

The Black Collar Crime Series relies on public news stories and publicly available information for its content. If any incorrect information is found, please contact Bruce Gerencser. Nothing in this post should be construed as an accusation of guilt. Those accused of crimes are innocent until proven guilty.

Phillip Buckson, pastor of Cleveland Chapel Baptist Church in Spartanburg, South Carolina, stands accused of repeatedly having sex with a minor, beginning at age thirteen, twice getting her pregnant. The pregnancies, according to The Charlotte Observer, were terminated. Buckson has been charged with four counts of second degree criminal sexual conduct with a minor. He is divorced, and father to two young children.

Buckson’s church bio page says:

Pastor Phillip J. Buckson, a native of Gaffney, SC. Born and raised in Gaffney, Pastor Buckson also was converted at the tender age of 9 and he’s been serving God in various capacities.

….

Pastor Buckson was educated in Gaffney for twelve year then furthered his education in Psychology at Spartanburg Methodist College. While attending SMC, Pastor Buckson was a stellar basketball player in which he earned national recognition and is now currently enrolled as a student at The N. J. Brockman School of Theology (Cowpens EXT.) Pastor Buckson serves as one of the coordinators for the Cherokee County School Curriculum Counsel.

Pastor Phillip J. Buckson was licensed to preach the gospel under the tutelage of Pastor C. A. Wallace at the Mt. Sinai Missionary Baptist Church, Gaffney, SC.,

Pastor Buckson served in many capacities. He later joined the Cleveland Chapel Baptist Church where he served as Assistant Minister under the leadership of Rev. Anthony R. Wilson..

In 2011, Pastor Buckson was called to Senior Pastorate Pine Grove Baptist Church, Iva SC.  He was ordained by the Little River Missionary Baptist Association were Pastor Joseph Caldwell is the Moderator.

In 2014 Pastor Buckson founded Phillip J. Buckson Ministries. Ministry that focuses on ministering to the total  person, God is really elevating his ministry.

In November of 2014, Pastor Phillip J. Buckson was called as the Senior Pastor of the Cleveland Chapel Baptist Church, Spartanburg South Carolina.

Pastor Buckson also served as President of The Young Pastors/ Preachers Association for the E &M Baptist convention of South Carolina.

Pastor Buckson has been called to many parts of the state and others states including Georgia, Chicago, North Carolina, Virginia, and Tennessee to preach the word of God.

Pastor Buckson’s motto is “Don’t Despise small beginnings; what God has for you is for you!”

Updates

Buckson has his bond set.

Independent Baptist Songs: I’ll Fly Away by Albert E. Brumley

albert e brumley

From time to time, I plan to post lyrics from the songs we sang in the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) churches I grew up in and pastored. Unbelievers and non-Fundamentalists might find some of these lyrics quite interesting, and, at times, funny or disturbing. Enjoy!

Today’s Independent Baptist Song is I’ll Fly Away by Albert E. Brumley. I was able to find a video of this song being sung by Ransomed Bluegrass.

I’ll Fly Away talks about believers dying and flying away to God’s celestial shores — Heaven, a land where joy shall never end. As with many gospels songs, I’ll Fly Away speaks of entrance into Heaven as being immediate and corporeal. That’s not, however, what the Bible says or what orthodox Christianity purportedly teaches. When believers die they don’t go to Heaven, they go to the grave and remain there until Jesus resurrects them from the dead. Grandma is not running around Heaven free of pain and with all her teeth. She’s dead, in the grave, and will remain there until Jesus — much as he did with Lazarus — says COME FORTH!

I’ll Fly Away by Albert E. Brumley

Some glad morning when this life is o’er,
I’ll fly away;
To a home on God’s celestial shore,
I’ll fly away (I’ll fly away).

Chorus:
I’ll fly away, Oh Glory
I’ll fly away; (in the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, by and by,
I’ll fly away (I’ll fly away).

When the shadows of this life have gone,
I’ll fly away;
Like a bird from prison bars has flown,
I’ll fly away (I’ll fly away)

Chorus

Just a few more weary days and then,
I’ll fly away;
To a land where joy shall never end,
I’ll fly away (I’ll fly away)

Video Link

About Albert E. Brumley:

Albert E. Brumley was born near Spiro, Oklahoma on October 29, 1905. Pre-Dustbowl Oklahoma was primarily made up of sparse agricultural communities; Brumley’s family was no different. He spent much of his early life chopping and picking cotton on his family’s farm. In 1926, he enrolled in the Hartford Musical Institute of Hartford, Arkansas, and studied there through 1931. The Institute was led by Eugene Monroe Bartlett (1884–1941), owner of the Hartford Music Company and composer of the well-known gospel song “Victory in Jesus”. Brumley purchased Hartford Music Company in 1948.

Brumley married Goldie Edith Schell in 1931. They lived on the banks of Big Sugar Creek in Powell, Missouri, where they raised six children.

“I’ll Fly Away,” “Turn Your Radio On,” “If We Never Meet Again (This Side of Heaven),” “I’ll Meet You In The Morning,” “Rank Strangers,” and “He Set Me Free” are among a host of favorites written by Albert E. Brumley. He wrote over 800 songs. He established the Albert E. Brumley Sundown to Sunup Gospel Sing (now Albert E. Brumley Gospel Sing) in 1969 in Springdale, Arkansas. Brumley has been inducted into the Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame, Gospel Music Hall of Fame, and Oklahoma Music Hall of Fame.

Albert Brumley was a member of the Church of Christ and is buried at Fox Church of Christ Cemetery near Powell, Missouri. He died November 15, 1977. Brumley’s son Tom, who would die in 2009, later became a respected steel guitarist in country music and songleader in the Church of Christ in Powell.

The Voices of Atheism: The Best of Christopher Hitchens — Arguments and Comebacks

christopher hitchens
Christopher Hitchens

This is the first installment in The Voices of Atheism series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. Know of a good video that espouses atheism/agnosticism or challenges the claims of the Abrahamic religions? Please email me the name of the video or a link to it. I believe his series will be an excellent addition to The Life and Times of Bruce Gerencser.

Thank you in advance for your help.

Today’s video features the late Christopher Hitchens. Enjoy!

Video Link

Books I Recommend by Christopher Hitchens

God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

Arguably: Essays by Christopher Hitchens

Mortality

The Portable Atheist: Essential Readings for the Nonbeliever

Hitch-22: A Memoir

The Voices of Atheism: Christopher Hitchens on Religion

christopher hitchens
Christopher Hitchens

This is the first installment in The Voices of Atheism series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. Know of a good video that espouses atheism/agnosticism or challenges the claims of the Abrahamic religions? Please email me the name of the video or a link to it. I believe his series will be an excellent addition to The Life and Times of Bruce Gerencser.

Thank you in advance for your help.

Today’s video features the late Christopher Hitchens participating in a panel discussion on religion. Enjoy!

Video Link

Books I Recommend by Christopher Hitchens

God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

Arguably: Essays by Christopher Hitchens

Mortality

The Portable Atheist: Essential Readings for the Nonbeliever

Hitch-22: A Memoir

Evangelical Pastor Dean Curry Starts New Church After Being Fired Over Sexual Misconduct

dean curry

Last July, Dean Curry, pastor of Life Center Assembly of God in Tacoma, Washington, was fired over sexual misconduct allegations. You can read my posts on Curry’s firing here, here, and here.  After sixth months on the disgraced pastors shelf, Curry has resurrected himself and started a new church in Tacoma, Washington. Called OURCHURCH, Curry’s new gig purports to be an inclusive congregation:

CHURCH. It’s a word with some baggage. Almost always defined by or linked with a term Jesus never used: “religion.” OURCHURCH isn’t about religion. We’re about Jesus. And Jesus is about truth, love, grace, peace, and life to the full. For everyone.

OUR: belonging to or connected with us; the possessive form of we

By definition, OUR is inclusive. You, me, us, we. OURCHURCH is simply a community of people learning to love Jesus and love people well together. Sound like something you’d like to be part of? Welcome to OUR.

I wonder if “inclusive” means accepting LGBTQ as they are and admitting them into the membership? I doubt. OUR CHURCH’s doctrinal statement is quite Evangelical, so I suspect that Curry will continue to preach against homosexuality, premarital sex, and same-sex marriage. The church’s doctrinal statement doesn’t mention Hell, though I suspect, again, Curry believes such a place exists and all non-Christians will end up there after they die.

Curry in an expert at hiding his real beliefs behind cutesy, evasive words, but make no mistake about it, Dean Curry is a card-Carrying Evangelical; an Evangelical pastor with sexual misconduct allegations in his past. Not that that has ever stopped a disgraced Evangelical preacher from starting a new church. You see, men such as Dean Curry (and Bruce Gerencser) are addicted to the ministry. They love the power, attention, and adulation. The ministry gives them meaning, purpose, and direction. The sum of their life is the ministry.  It is for these reasons, and others, disgraced preachers rarely leave the ministry altogether. Once a preacher, always a preacher, the thinking goes. And if men such as Curry believe God has “called” them, they even have Biblical justification for their continuation in the ministry despite their crimes and/or misconduct:

For the gifts and calling of God are without repentance. (Romans 11:29)

I have no doubt Curry believes he is “called” by Jesus to start OURCHURCH and be its senior pastor. When someone believes God talks to them personally, there’s little anyone can do to change their minds. It will be interesting to see how many people join with Curry at his new gig. Something tells me, he will draw more than a few people from his former church; people who believe the accusations against Curry are false or they believe he is sufficiently repentant for his past ill behavior.

The current leaders of the church are as follows: Dean Curry, Senior Pastor, Brandon Perritte, Lead Pastor, Melanie Grassi Wood, Executive Pastor, and Tait Stocking, Pastor to Kids and Families

OURCHURCH’s Facebook page.

Sacrilegious Humor: The Best of Bill Maher on Islam and Christianity

bill maher

This is the fifty-eighth installment in the Sacrilegious Humor series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. If you know of a comedy bit that is irreverent towards religion, makes fun of religion, pokes fun at sincerely held religious beliefs, or challenges the firmly held religious beliefs of others, please email me the name of the bit or a link to it.

Today’s video is a compilation of Bill Maher’s bits on Islam and Christianity.

Video Link

Sacrilegious Humor: Compilation of Comedy Bits on Religion

atheists-go-to-heaven
Comic by Mark Lynch

This is the fifty-seventh installment in the Sacrilegious Humor series. This is a series that I would like readers to help me with. If you know of a comedy bit that is irreverent towards religion, makes fun of religion, pokes fun at sincerely held religious beliefs, or challenges the firmly held religious beliefs of others, please email me the name of the bit or a link to it.

Today’s video is a compilation of various comedians doing bits on religion.

Video Link

Christians Say the Darnedest Things: Phil Robertson Says He Doesn’t Need Medical Insurance

phil robertson aids

We have been given — contrary to what Kamala Harris said — she says, ‘Elect me and everything’s free!’ Look! Everybody can have their own health care, the government is going to finance the whole thing! It’s not going to cost but $30 trillion. I’m offering you the greatest deal you ever had. Elect me and everything will be free!

What I’m saying is that, Kamala, I already have health care. It’s given to me by God. Eternal health care. I’m guaranteed to be raised from the dead. I have life and immortality given to me by God through Jesus.

(“People get sick on Earth,” Cavuto pointed out.)

The temporary reprieve is not worth it. I’m telling her, I have eternal health care and it’s free.

….

(The “Duck Commander” went on to insist that President Donald Trump never lies.)

A man that talks a lot like the president of the United States, he’s going to make some mistakes. I’m just saying the news media, according to Jesus, the evil one is the father of murder — that kind of fills in the blanks on why we’re such a murderous nation all the way down to killing our sons and daughters in our mothers’ wombs. And he’s the father of lies. I’ve never seen the extent of this kind of lying coming out of the news media. I’ve never seen anything like it since I’ve been on the Earth.

(“But you don’t see it out of the president?” Cavuto pressed.)

I would say Donald Trump is not a liar. [And Bruce says, Phil Robertson has dementia.]

— Phil Robertson, Crooks and Liars, Duck Commander Yells About Medicare For All, February 5, 2019

Want to hear more nonsense from Fundamentalist Phil Robertson? Watch the video, but make sure you have a barf bag handy. Trust me, you’ll need it.